BLOODLUST

Remembering What's Used to Be

“Good night mother.” I said before I closed the door.

I ran back to my room and locked the doors. I hurried towards my desk and opened the largest drawer where I think I saw a small notebook that looks like a passport. And there it is. I opened it and saw that I’ve already travelled five countries.

I was in Dublin Ireland in 2001, Iloilo Philippines in 2003, Paris France in 2006, Nagoya Japan in 2008 and Prague Czech Republic in 2011. I’ve been to Prague before. I wonder why I’ve been to so many countries as a child. Maybe my family just loved vacations.

My brown leather carry all bag contained my passport and the essential stuff like my phone, the remaining money my aunt gave me on the first day of school and the wad of cash I just got from mom. I also had the small notebook that Peter gave me, a burglar spray and an insect repellant lotion I got from a convenience store on our way back home. I also dropped in my fragrances, my sun screen lotion and a pen if I’d need to sign or write anything. I hid my passport on my bag’s secret pocket.

My huge Lacoste pack bag contained two sets of five disposable underwear which Kathy suggested so I won’t have to do any laundry. I didn’t know I had so many shorts so I chose four that seemed comfortable and not too short for a walk in the forest. I folded them all as neatly as I could so they stay flat on the base of my backpack. I added two tank tops and two V-neck tees. For travelling at night I added a cute pink hoodie and a woolen cardigan. I also managed to snug in my shimmery beige loafers and my comfy flip flops.

I drifted into a good night’s sleep and woke up a minute before my alarm was about to ring.

Excited for what this beautiful morning might bring me, I jumped into the shower and took a quick bath, pouring in extra shampoo and extra body wash. After I dried myself with my white fluffy towel I decided to wrap it around me and go out of the bathroom to pick what clothes to wear.

The moment I opened the door I saw Peter. He was leaning against the door with his arms folded and his head cocked to my direction. His beautiful green eyes stared at me as he swept his flaxen blonde hair off of them. He was wearing a black long sleeved sweater that hung loose on his shoulders. His pants were neatly pressed dark wash denim. Everything about him spoke classic elegance and spontaneity.

“Oh hey, what are you doing here?” I asked but he didn’t answer. “Um, I’m going to get dressed so would you mind if you leave for just one moment?” I asked but then again, he didn’t answer.

He just continued staring at me with no specific emotions going through his eyes. He walks towards me and I instinctively stepped back. He stopped in front of me and breathed deeply, seemingly inhaling my scent. “I miss you.” He said as I wasn’t able to grasp where this conversation is going.

“Excuse me?” I asked, stepping further back as he got nearer and nearer to me.

His eyes wandered all over my face, seemingly memorizing all my features as he tucked a stray hair off of my cheek. He gently held my face as I was frozen in shock. He pressed his soft lips against mine and kissed me rather forcefully.

I struggled but he was horrifyingly strong. It was like being wrapped around a sheet of the softest silk inside a tight metal casket. The thick white towel that covered me fell on my toes because of my resistance to his pursuits. I couldn’t scream because his mouth was covering mine, owing me like a hungry animal desperate for love to be given back. I shivered with the cold air from the air conditioning touching my naked body.

I wanted to pick it up but he was too strong to keep my still and unable to move an inch.

His hand wandered down the mounds of my breasts and the contours of my buttocks. He lets go of my face and forcefully pushed me in the sheets of my bed. He was fast to pin me down and kiss my lips again so I couldn’t scream. He was unrealistically fast and I don’t know how to explain what I just saw. I was kicking and punching him over and over again but he doesn’t seem to mind my struggle.