𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭. carl grimes

27 - TRACKS

"Tyreese."

The latter turns to us and his face lit up when he saw us. He ran towards my mom and hugged her, but the thought of my mom killing the woman he loved, crossed my mind again and I had to look away. He still doesn't know, from his reaction I could tell that he still doesn't know.

"How'd you find us?" He asked my mom when he pulled away. "Where were you? How'd you—"

We all turn to the man who's sobbing. The man's neck is bitten and blood is oozing out of it, but he doesn't seem to give a damn. He kneeled down in front of a dead body, I assume it was his son.

My mom and Tyreese walked towards him and he looked up. "Stay on the tracks. That was my mistake."

"But the woods have more cover." My mom told the man.

"No, you don't understand." The man tells my mom and my eyebrows furrow in confusion. "There's a place up the tracks. It's safe. You can take the children there."

My mom glanced back at me but I don't know what to say. She turns back to the man. "Please. Trust me. Follow the tracks."

And so we do. We left the man sobbing as we follow the train tracks, to wherever this track leads us. I stayed beside my mom this whole time.

"Bullets missed you this time?" My mom joked and I chuckled, nodding my head.

"Yeah, I guess they don't like me anymore." I joked back and this time, she's the one who chuckles.

"Here." She points to her bag. "There's some water in there, and some food."

Her bag drops to the ground and Tyreese picks it up, giving it back to my mom. I'm not hungry nor thirsty right now, I'm just happy that my mom's here and I can be with her again.

"I didn't see you get out." Tyreese said. "I thought you—"

My mom cuts him off. "I wasn't there. I hadn't gotten back yet. Rick and I found a car, he took what we had back to the prison while I... kept looking."

I suddenly wonder, how would Tyreese react when he finds out? If he finds out? Tyreese may be a good guy but what they say is true, the ones who are kind are the ones who you don't want to anger, they can turn from good to evil in a damn second.

We started walking again, Tyreese and my mom behind us as she carries Judith, while I walk beside Mika. She grabs my hand and holds it, before smiling at me. My thoughts brought me to Carl.

Whenever Carl and I hold hands, our fingers are always laced with each other, then one of us would squeeze first and then the other would squeeze back. It was a sign that we're okay. We never really talked about that but we understood.

Carl... I hope he's alright.

Hope.

Huh, I haven't really said that word since Sophia died. I hated that word, because that was what I always did back then. I hoped and hoped that Sophia is okay, that she would come back, that Rick, Daryl and the others would find her. When we did found her, it was too late.

My hope dimmed after that and my hope vanished when I thought my mom was gone too. But even though she's still here with me, alive, that hope never came back. I refuse to let it come back.

But now, here I am. Hoping that Carl's okay, that he made it out.

Mika stopped walking beside me so that made me snap out of my thoughts. My eyes landed on a map and a sign above it. We all walked towards it, reading what the sign said.

"Sanctuary for all. Community for all. Those who arrive, survive." Mika reads out loud. I looked at the map below it and saw something written there.

Terminus.

So this was what the man was talking about? This place called Terminus?

Don't tell me this place is gonna welcome us with Thomas the Train and his goddamn train friends.

— next day

I arched my back as I stand up, stretching my body as I hear bones cracking. It feels good. Sleeping on the ground is definitely a bad idea but I have no other choice. We're still pretty far away from this Terminus.

"Farren?" I turned to Mika, who was cradling Judith. "Can you tie my hair up, please?"

"Sure." I said before going behind her, removing her ponytail before gathering her hair and putting it in a ponytail. I finger-comb it a little but the knots don't go away. "There."

Mika thanked me before I removed my ponytail and do the same to my hair. I could really use a shower and a good comb right now. Hell, all of us do. We all smell like walkers.

"Let's get moving." My mom announces and we nod before we start walking again.

Mika goes to talk to my mom about that Tom Sawyer book and they started saying who's likely to this character. I walk ahead of them and behind was Tyreese carrying Judith.

"Terminus." I heard Mika sing in her robot voice, making me glance back. She started doing her robot dance, making me amused. "I am a robot. Come live with me at Terminus, where we have robot parties and dance with our robot friends. Terminus."

I smiled. She reminds me of Sophia.

We kept going on until minutes later, we spot a few walkers down the hill. My eyebrows furrowed as I see Lizzie waving at them with a smile.

"Lizzie, don't." My mom sways her, making her stop. "Eyes forward."

Later on, my mom and Mika went away to go and look for some water and I stayed behind with Tyreese, Judith and Lizzie. They're playing I spy, but I didn't join. Sophia and I used to play that game whenever we go on road trips, my dad would always tell us to stop because we were annoying him, but we kept on playing it, just quietly.

"I spy trees and weeds." Lizzie tells Tyreese as I keep my back on them, staying on watch. "Your turn."

A faint snarl catches my attention and I turned to my left, seeing a walker not too far on the tracks. I grabbed my switchblade. "I spy a dead walking bastart."

"Stay here." Tyreese tells me as he hands me Judith. I took her without another word as Tyreese goes to kill the walker. Lizzie runs after him.

"Lizzie." I try to stop her but she wouldn't. I followed her while carrying Judith.

"Tyreese." Lizzie stops the man from killing the walker. "Sometimes we have to kill them. I know that. But sometimes we don't."

I step up. "We always have to kill walkers or else it'll kill us."

Lizzie looks at me in the eyes. "We don't always have to, Farren."

Tyreese and I looked at each other as Lizzie walks back to where we were earlier. Ty grabs Judith from me and we left the walker there, snarling at us. My mom and Mika soon came back, and we walk through the woods, apparently they found a house that we can sleep in during the night.

As we walk, I think about Lizzie. I feel sorry for the girl. She's messed up, I don't know how she got to that state, but I feel sorry for her. I wonder if she was like this even before the breakout, or this is what she had become.

And as I think of that, I wonder how much I've changed from this scared little girl, to this walker killer. I used to feel sorry every time I kill a walker, especially the first time I killed a walker, but now I feel no remorse at all. I was afraid of holding a gun and a knife back then, but now I can't seem to live without them. I used to pray to God to keep everyone safe, but now I don't anymore.

I don't know what to believe anymore, but I do know is that I have to protect my mom and Judith and everyone else, I have to find Carl and the others. I believe they made it out, because if I let myself believe they didn't—that he didn't, I don't know what I'm gonna do.

Later on we cleared the house and night falls, we're at the living room and I'm laying down on the couch with my boots removed. It feels good to give my feet some air.

Judith is asleep on the crib and I figured I should get some shuteye too. I say goodnight to my mom, the girls and Tyreese, before drifting off.