(RusAme) ~ Roommates ~ (CountryHumans)

eleveN

"I... don't think he wants to be friends."

Canada focused back on the TV. "So what? You have loads of friends already. One more or one less doesn't matter in the end."

America was silent.

"And does having friends even matter? We all die alone Merica, it's not a big deal."

America felt the corner of his eyes prick. Damn it, not again! How come even the slightest thought of being alone was enough to make him bawl his eyes out? He hated feeling so scared about something that was ultimately inevitable. "Y-yeah, I guess you're right."

A few moments passed. One of the teams on-screen scored a goal. "So why're you here?" Canada asked. "I'm sure it wasn't just to come watch hockey."

America looked down. He wasn't sure exactly why he had come, but being in the presence of his older brother usually made him feel relaxed. Right now, though, he just felt tense. America took a moment to form a sentence in his head before speaking. "Uh, weird question dude, but... do you hate me?"

"Huh?" Canada looked startled by the question, like a deer in headlights. "What?"

"Do you hate me? Am I annoying?"

"Woah, what's with the sudden need for validation??"

America's eyes started filling up with tears, and he silently prayed that they would stay in his goddamn eyes and not spill out. "I just, um- "

Canada's voice softened. "Merica, what's wrong?"

America started playing with the hem of his shirt, feeling the need to do something with his fingers to distract himself from the words he was saying. "I'm just, uh, afraid that you- you hate me," America finally said, his voice small as a stutter slipped out. "Because- because you're s-so important to me, and - "

Canada cut him off. "America, you're my brother. I'll never hate you."

"But- but you have, I know you have, everyone's hated m-me at some point," America pushed out. "I'm not st-stupid bro, I know t-that - "

Canada wrapped America in his arms and America buried his face in Canada's fuzzy coat like he used to do when they were little, hands clenching the back of his jacket. "Now where'd you get a dumb idea like that?" Canada said softly. "You're my brother. We've had our differences, but I've never hated you, and I'm sure your friends don't either. They wouldn't be your friends otherwise."

"What- what if they're j-just trying to use me?" America asked, his voice muffled.

Canada didn't answer, instead responding with a question of his own. "What's got you asking these things? I've never seen you so insecure..."

"S-sorry," America sniffed, pulling away and wiping his eyes under his glasses. He felt a small surge of pride at the fact that the tears hadn't spilled.

Canada took his shoulders. "No, no, don't apologize, don't apologize for feeling things. I'm just worried about you."

America shook his head rapidly, shaking the sadness away. "I'm fine dude, I just needed to vent. Sorry, that was weird." Crying in front of other people is so weird. I am never doing this again.

They watched the hockey game for a few minutes.

"So this all started because Russia wouldn't be your friend?" Canada finally said, wearing a shit-eating grin that America himself had worn all too many times. "He must be important to you, eh?"

America half heartedly hit Canada. "That's not all of it, you tree-licker. There's other stuff too."

"So all you have to do is make friends with him, and then you'll be happy," Canada summarized, glancing at the TV. America looked too. Both teams had scored points.

That's a really simple way of putting it, but sure. "Well, I kinda just had a tiny fight with him?" America said, his voice higher at the end. "Except it was more just him insulting me."

"A fight, eh? About what?"

America hummed. "I think I did something weird last night while drunk, but he won't tell me. Remember Japan's party?"

"Nah, didn't go," Canada leaned back on the couch. "That's not my scene, eh."

Of course. America's phone buzzed with a text, and he glanced at it. "Oh shit!"

"What?"

America shoved his phone back in his pocket, standing up. "I promised Czech we would hang out today, and I totally forgot. I need to go; thanks for talking with me!"

Canada reached up and slapped America on the back, making the other cough. "Of course! Come to me any time bro, but next time let's play hockey instead of cry, eh?"

America laughed a little. "Sure."

eh

04/03/19