The Only Reason That I Sing

Chapter 13

I was right. School has been good for me. Everyone was shocked that I was back, but they helped me catch up on schoolwork and my grades. I'm now back to the girl I was before. Except for Patrick. Patrick tried to talk to me, but every time he does it makes me want to cry. Because I miss him, and I know that I can't go back to him. Because I hurt him. I hurt him way too much, and I'm not good for him. In the middle of my thought process, he texted me.

Incoming message from: Patrick

Hey Luce, do you have a minute to talk? 12:35 P.M.

Outgoing message to: Patrick

Yeah, do you want to meet somewhere? 12:36 P.M.

Incoming message from: Patrick

Meet me in the empty classroom in five minutes. 12:36 P.M.

I know, I know it's probably a bad Idea to meet up with him. But I know it needs to happen sometime, rather sooner than later. I walked my way, taking my time to get there, to the empty classroom Patrick mentioned. As promised, five minutes later, I walked into the room to see Patrick leaning against the wall with his eyes closed. He looked as handsome as ever. He was wearing a red sweater with a white shirt underneath, and jeans which his hands were stuck into the pockets of. He was humming a tune, hence not noticing that I had walked into the room. He was much, Much skinnier than he was when we broke up, probably only a little heaver than me. His hair was under his fedora, but there was still pieces that stuck out every which way.

I walked a little further into the room, and stood directly across the room from him, listening to the tune he was humming. It was pretty, soft and calm. After he was done, he opened his eyes, shocked to see that I was smiling at him. He blushed.

"How long have you been there?" He asked me, politely but embarrassed.

"A while." I chuckled. "It was good, what is it called?" I asked, trying to make small talk.

"I'm not sure, I haven't written the lyrics yet." He sighed out of exasperation. I nodded, but stayed quiet. He looked down at the floor for a bit, then looked up. "How have you been?" I laughed softly.

"As good as I can be." I rolled my eyes in a joking matter, and took my turn at looking at the floor. He sighed.

"Luce I-"

"I'm sorry Patrick." I blurted out. I didn't even think about saying that, it just came out. He looked at me, motioning for me to continue. I brushed my hair out of my face and did as he wished. "I did still love you. No, I do still love you. I had so many emotions built up, and I just needed to be alone. But I hurt you, broke you. Just because I was a little hurt that my brother died. I had no right to shove you away like that, when you were only trying to be there for me." I sighed, as I ran out of breath. "Okay I'm done". He laughed lightly, and looked down at his hands.

"You're right." he stated simply. "You did hurt me. You shattered my heart. I really truly thought... You didn't love me anymore. I thought I had lost you, forever. I cried every night. And I'm not telling you this to make you feel bad, I'm telling you because I need you to know how you affect me. I love you Luce, more than almost anything in this whole world." He took two steps toward me, but there was still a fair amount of space between us. "Lucinda fucking Jacobson... you, you are the love of my life. And i cannot... I cant live without you." he started to choke up, but immediately stopped himself from talking any further. He stepped back against the wall again, and leaned his head against the wall with his eyes closed.

Silence. That was what filled the room. Although, that was to be expected, considering everything that has been said in the past minute and a half. I wanted to touch him. I wanted to hold him, kiss him. But I knew I couldn't. I shook my head and sighed.

"I'm sorry Patrick." I looked up at him before I started heading towards the door. I walked swiftly, and quietly. There where tears welling up inside, but I couldn't let him know that.

"Luce, stop." Patrick said from behind me, before I could set foot outside of the door. I stopped dead in my tracks as he told me to, but I didn't turn around and look at him. I felt a hand wrap around my upper arm, but I still didn't react. he put his other had around my waist and flipped me around, so I was facing him. I looked up at him, and looked into his gorgeous eyes. They where blue, with a little yellow ring around the pupil, which on occasion made them look green. But right now, they looked blue. Ocean blue, and as clear as a crystal. He searched my eyes, and when all he found was tears, He sighed with exasperation. He pulled me to his chest, and that's when the tears started coming out.

"Hey, hey shh Luce I'm okay now." he whispered, as he rubbed my head, running his hands through my hair. I wrapped my arms around his waist, and buried my head into his sweater. I sobbed. And I sobbed for a while. I sobbed until my tears ran out, then I dry sobbed. I felt a few tears of his drop onto my shoulder, but I knew he was just trying to keep calm for me. The bell rang, a few minutes ago, but neither of us could care less. I eventually pulled away and looked at him. He smiled at me, reached over, and wiped away those stupid little tears running down my cheeks. I smiled softly at him, and he kissed my forehead. I shook my head and laughed softly. He reached up, pulled the fedora off of his head, and placed it on mine.

"I love you Lucinda Jacobson. I always will. Never, ever forget that."

{::}

-BeautifulDreamer202