her way ✰ (dallas winston x reader)

chapter 87 - doomed

short chapter but eventful

~your p.o.v~

Dallas and I sat on opposite ends of the bed at his place at Buck's. I was closet to the foot of the bed, leaning against the wall as I studied the gun in my hands. Dallas sat closer to the headboard of his bed, also leaning against the wall. He had one of his legs bent up, leaning his arm against it. He propped his head up on his hand, his eyes on me and the gun I was studying.

I sat criss cross on the bed, my eyes on the gun I had used to kill someone.

"You should really stop lookin at that gun. It's getting to your head." He mumbled. I nodded, only half listening.

"Okay." I spoke, my eyes still on the gun.

"So what are you gonna do, huh? Turn yourself in? Leave town without a trace?" He chuckled to himself and I glanced at him momentarily.

"I gotta leave, Dal. I killed someone."

"You lied to me. I hope you know that."

I now looked up at him, ignoring the gun.

"What-"

"What happened to you sticking around? You said you weren't going anywhere, and neither was Johnny. Now both of you are leaving, huh? What does that leave me with, Y/n?"

"Dal-"

"It leaves me with nothing." He spat. My eyes widened.

"That's not fair, Dallas! I didn't know any of this would happen! And Johnny isn't gone. Not yet anyway. I would stay if I could, but I can't. You know I can't." I protested, feeling my body begin to shake. I'd been so nervous lately, I was sick of it.

"Well he's dying in the fucking hospital! It would've been easier if we'd never met." He said in a cold tone. I felt my heart drop.

"You wish we never met?"

"Yeah."

I laced my fingers in my hair, my body caving in. I hid my face in my knees, a quiet sob escaping from me. Dallas stayed quiet, he didn't do anything to comfort me. Could I blame him?

I finally calmed down, wiping my eyes. I stood up, feeling unsteady.

"Just forget about me then, Dallas. Anything to make this easier on you." And I meant what I said. He already had so much shit going on. I wouldn't want to be another burden.

I tucked the gun into the waistband of my jeans and started heading for the door. He didn't stop me or protest.

My hand touched the doorknob when a firm hand wrapped around my arm.

"Please don't leave. I'm sorry, I just can't handle everything happening." I turned to Dallas and I could barely handle what I saw.

Dallas was crying.

"You have every right to be upset with me. I lied to you and promised something that I wasn't even sure if myself. I'm sorry, Dallas." I started crying too, but I grabbed his arms as he grabbed mine.

"I need you, Y/n." He whispered, his hands softly holding both sides of my face. I squeezed my eyes shut, crying harder.

We leaned our foreheads together, both of us crying hard.

"I need you too, Dallas. I don't know what we're gonna do."

He took a shaky breath.

"We were doomed from the start."