I like a boy who doesn't do promises.
But I loved him.
It's him who made all those damned promises.
But I still loved him.
I really hate promising. Because we don't know what the future offers us. And making a promise is a big damn deal.
Telling me that "I promise not to hurt you" is sweet but I like it more to hear "I won't promise not to hurt you because I don't know what the future offers but if I hurt you, I will surely wipe your tears away and will make you feel loved."
I promised him one thing. I told him " susugal ako para sa'yo" and yes I fuckin' did. I answered him with my yes even though my family told me that I will only have a boyfriend when I turn 18. I lied to my family because of him.
But all of it was now wasted.
He said "hindi ko maramdaman na mahal mo 'ko" and that is the biggest bullshit I've ever heard in my whole damned life. Yes I don't hug him, because I'm not clingy, I don't always tell him ily because I'm not expressive. It's my fault but damn, it hurts. Just because I'm not affectionate? Damn it's been only three months since I entered a relationship and this is what I get? Well, what the fuck? Can't he wait for me? So I could adjust in being affectionate and all.
March 5, 2019. I told myself that this will be the last day that I will be expecting him to get back to me. And he didn't so I guess it's a thank u, bye.
