The Beautiful World (Hetalia Oneshots)

May I/England

Song: May I
Trading Yesterday

Character:Arthur Kirkland/
England
Warning: mentions of self harm, and suicide. Angst. Lots of sad.
------------------------------------------------------

Reader

The cold rain ran down my face mixing with the hot tears pouring from (e/c) eyes. Rain water tangled my hair, falling to the rain soaked London sidewalk. My walking was staggered as my knees shook. I gripped the wall next to me, leaving bloody marks that was washed away by the rain.

It felt like there was a heavy weight on my chest, and a cord around my throat that restricted the flow of oxygen. I stayed so focused on my thoughts that I could hardly see. My mind was in a million different places, and reality wasn't one of them.

I was so utterly done with this life. I was done with everything. I was done with the constant bullying, the abuse, the pain. I was done with wearing long sleeves to cover my scars...I was so goddamn over being alone.

I was walking now... letting blood drip from my fingertips to the rainy sidewalk, letting my feet carry me where ever they wanted... hopefully to my death.

There was nothing for me here. Nothing and no one...

There was a slight ring that snapped me put of my thought. I noticed that the pelting rain had stopped hitting me, instead landing on the overhang of the porch I stood on.

My hand lingered on the doorbell, letting pinkish rain stain the pearly button. I knew this house. It was the house of my best friend, my only friend, Arthur.

My heart erupted into a flutter of embarrassment. Arthur can't see me like this... broken, and on the edge of dying... I can't let him see me as the mess I am...

Though he already has...he was the one comforting me through my 3 a.m. panic attacks. He was the one who would sit with me at lunch to make sure no one messed with me. He was the one who texted everyday so I wasn't lonely. He was the one who listened when I spoke. He was my best friend. I went to him everytime I felt this way: lost, lonely, broken...

So why was I so scared to let him see me this time?

Because this was the last time...

I turned on my heels hoping to leave before he could answer the door. But to my dismay, the second I had taken a step off the porch, the door opened.

"Hello, love," The brit greeted as he saw me "what are you doing in the rain without an umbrella? You'll catch a cold."

I looked over my shoulder at him. His emerald green eyes met mine. His soft smile fell from his pale face as his eyes lowered to scan the rest of my messy figure.

"Blood?" he asked keeping his eyes on my hands. I nodded looking at the pink water dripping from my finger tips.

"Yea..."

"Love..." he sighed taking my cold hands in his. He rubbed my knuckles gently. "Come inside"

I let him lead my into his house, even though I just wanted to leave before he could see me as the mess I was right now.

I just wanted out...

And there you stand opened heart--opened doors