Careful with the tea

Part 21

I woke up in my room, alone. The Library was silent as a grave. My head was splitting, as I remembered what'd happened to me. Last time I was desperate, not able to face the hopeless of the situation. I chose escaping then.

Now everything was different.

I knew my place in the game exactly. I knew, what Alice could feel now, and I hoped so much, Hatter would be able to convince her that his heart is all hers for ever.

Regarding me, although the evil Tea of True Love was burning me from inside as living fire, I made a promise to myself, that I'd get rid of it, whatever it takes.

I won't allow that stupid Tea to ruin somebody else's life.

I stood up and went to find Owl .

She was in her room, yet not alone.

Alice and Hatter were sitting next to her, and Marcus was standing at the window turning his back to us.

As I entered, they all went silent. I saw the eyes of Alice were red from crying. I had no tears, just  a few words only to tell them how sorry I was about the whole thing.

I stack to the basics instead.

"Let us solve this fast, please... Hatter..." Alice trembled as I called her love on his true name, but I had to be cruel and go on, for our sake. "I want everything to be like before. I don't want this to get between you. So give me some Tea, now. Have some Forgetting left?"

Hatter shook his head sadly.

"We have to give that up. Only one was such a bis shock for you. After Remembering a new cup of forgetting would be fatal. You could get a one way ticket to the Hospital of Dreams and no-one could help you."

"We have to do something, we must..." I stepped closer to them. I looked at Alice. "I ask it for your sake..."

Hatter was thinking.

"There is still one solution, though very risky as well..." he said finally.

"I don't care. Here with it."

"Right. I need some more Honesty. If you drink that, your feelings and thoughts will return, which are true and really come from your heart. Those may conquer the... well, these current ones..." he finished with uncertainty in his voice.

"And what's the trick?" I asked, and I saw Marcus listening carefully, from the corner of my eye.

"This means total honesty. You won't be able to hold back what you have on mind, and if anybody asks questions, you will have to tell everything.. Are you sure you want this?

If I wasn't blinded by my aims, to get things right and fix everything, I'd surely think twice what full and unlimited honesty meant in my case.

But I didn't care about anything else, only to see Alice and Hatter happy again.

"Don't waste time, please... I've caused already too much trouble."

"Right." He nodded, and hurried out of the room. I stepped to Alice.

"I'm so sorry... Please, forgive me... I didn't want to hurt you at all..."

"Kate..." Alice cried again, and we held each other.

Owl was sniffling too, and to be useful she went and brought a jug of real black tea.

We all forced ourselves to forget out roubles and have some.

Marcus stood wordless for a while then he took a cup as well.

I looked at him, he looked at me. I tried to find out what I saw in his eyes, but for a second false emotions ran over me, and all I could see was the face of Hatter, all I could feel was the taste of his kiss...

I shook myself and put the cup down the table with a noise, then fled to the window, with my back to the others. I had to cover my ears, and close my eyes, but even then I failed to shake the memories off me. As hopelessness covered me and I felt sadness squeezing my heart, I looked back to Alice and her tearful face.

This helped and returned my desperation and confidence, that I do the right thing. Hatter came back soon with a tiny glass in his hand. The green liquid glittered inside, and I reached for it with greedy hands.

"I don't think you should drink that here and now, Kate." Hatter pulled away his hand.

"There's no time for this." I resisted. "Here with it, hurry!"

Alice stood between us.

"We are grateful, that you do this, but we don't want to force you into a bad situation. You'd better be alone, when Honesty finds you. Who knows, what'd happen, if you had to spit out your most protected secrets against your own will..."

I made such a face, that they all understood, and no further rejection was made. Hatter passed me the glass, and I went to leave.

"Are you sure?" Marcus told me, and I stopped for a second.

"I'll be in the basement room. We must go hope this evening. If I'm not here by start, come for me."

Then I hurried out, right to that old forgotten tiny room, where I had already fled in once.