Eighteen

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Ethan

The days before the surgery that I've prepared myself to live in sheer boredom and excessive thinking never happened. Skye was there every single day and she had me doing things I've never thought I would do. Every day she would 'kidnap' me as she liked to call it and we hit the road. Never once did she tell me where we were going. It was always a 'surprise'.

Some of those surprises were relaxing and calming like when we walked on the beach hand in hand. Or when we went to a concert. Or when she signed us up for a pottery class where we created a plate or something and I proved once again that I do not have a nickel's worth of art in me. I was trying to make a mug for Skye, but somehow ended up making a mug that was as wide as a bowl instead. The sweet ring of Skye's laugh when she saw it had me grinning. She kept it anyway.

On the other hand, I was astounded by the things we did. We went rock wall climbing, which for a blind person wasn't that easy. Skye instructed the placing of my hands and feet all the way to the top. The afterwards muscle ache was a pleasant change. Another day we went parasailing despite the cold weather. We glided in air wearing an open parachute while a motorboat sliced the waves on high speed dipping our toes in water every once and a while. The water was fine once got used to it. After we got out Skye was shivering in my arms for a long time before she was warm again. And the madness carries on.

The most crazy thing she had us doing was bungee jumping. Where the hell did she find that? I honestly have no clue. And to think that I would object or disagree or something. Huh! Never happened. However, she did apologize -ever so sweetly- if we plummeted to our death. She had a tight grip around me and her screams were only muffled by my shoulder were she hid when we stepped over the edge. Soon both of us were laughing as we dangled upside down by ropes. What a rush!

The day before the surgery we had an early dinner at Skye's house. I tried not to overthink about what tomorrow was bringing, but my mind kept going to that point. The surgery itself didn't worry me. It's the results that had me tied in knots. Not to mention the quite good number of recovery days I'll be having after words.

I felt the softness of Skye's hand as she covered mine. I turned my head to where she sat next to me at the dinner table and smiled. She squeezed my hand and it felt like a caress straight on the nerves. I had no doubt that she'll be by my side through the good and the bad.

After dinner I suggested we'd go for a walk. I wanted to talk to her. We strolled slowly hand in hand slightly swinging with every step. I breathed in the scent of the night. The cold air scented with the salty smell of the sea and the sweet perfume of the piece of my heart that was walking next to me. I couldn't hear many people around us and only a few cars passed by. The moment was perfect.

"I never got to say thank you." I said interrupting the silence.

"For what?"

"For the past days." I grinned and she laughed. "Even when you were scared, cold or tiered you never backed down."

"I had you with me." her hands hugged mine between them and her voice smiled at me. I felt my heart flutter.

We continued sauntering in silence for a while. Or at least I hoped it was in silence because I could hear the loud, out of rhythm thuds which were supposed to be in my chest right in my ears. Anxiety started to pull on my nerves mercilessly. I swallowed hard and then cleared my throat. I never felt this nervous in my life not even when I played football and had a big game. Inhale... exhale.

"I want to tell you something ." I broke the silence again.

"Hmm."

Inhale... exhale, "I know it might be selfish saying this just one day before the surgery..." I stopped walking and turned to face her. I placed her hand on my chest suddenly needing to feel her close. My thumb gently stroking her wrist, "I wanted to tell you this many times before but I couldn't bring myself to." I scoffed at myself knowing now that there was no way I could've escaped this, "I thought by holding back I was saving myself the heartache in case you walked away. Or if you didn't feel the same way about me, but even though, even if you didn't share the same feelings as I do, it's fine... it's just that I can no longer hold back any more..."

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