The Burden of Knowledge (An Umbrella Academy/Number Five Fan-Fiction)

Chapter Five: Always Will Be

~~~Five~~~
Suddenly, Mary just went limp and started falling.

"Mary? Mary!" I caught her, pulling her over to my bed and laying her down on it. I put my hands on her face. "Mary...come on, Mary, wake up. What is happening?"

I felt panic start to rise up in my chest. What if she had too many visions and it caused her brain to overload? What if, in trying to remind her of things that had yet to happen to her, I killed her. I shook my head.

"Mary, come on...please wake up." I pushed her hair out of her face. "I can't lose you, you have to wake up, you have to." She still didn't move. I turned forward, burying my head in my hands as tears came to my eyes. What did I do? What have I done? Mary...

Memories of the last thirty years filled my head like a slideshow. Images of Mary fighting, laughing, telling me I drink too much, all of that gone because I forced her into doing something that-

My mourning was interrupted by a gasp, and I turned around to see Mary, sitting up straight, her eyes wide. She was breathing heavily, a hand pressed against her forehead.

"Thank God." I said. "I thought you were dead." She looked at me, looking a bit out of sorts.

"No...no, not dead, just...seeing the abridged version of the past thirty years."

"It worked?" I asked, turning towards her. She nodded, rubbing her eyes.

"At my expense evidently. Apparently three decades of visions all at once causes a killer headache."

"I'll get you some aspirin." I said, going to stand up. She stopped me, grabbing my arm. I sat down again, turning to face her. She put a hand on my face, wiping away a forgotten tear with her thumb. Then she leaned forward, wrapping her thin arms around my neck and hugging me. I hugged her back with a hand in her hair. 

"I'm ok...just so you know. And I'm not going anywhere." I smiled, pulling away from her again.

"Now that sounded like the Mary that I know." She smiled.

"Well, context is everything. A person's experiences make the person. But, considering I didn't actually live them yet, don't expect everything to be exactly the same."

"I won't." I stood up, going to the bathroom and getting the Aspirin and a cup of water before coming back. I walked into the room to find her laying down on my bed...fast asleep. I smiled, setting it down on the desk and walking over to the bed, crawling in beside her on the side that was closest to the wall. I laid on my back, staring at the ceiling and listening to her soft breathing as she slept. I had a feeling that the visions were going to trigger the nightmares, which was a common occurrence in her life. She was more affected by the people we killed than I was.

Not because she was weak because that definitely wasn't true. And it certainly wasn't because I was stronger than her, because that wasn't it either.

She's just a better person than I am. Always has been. Always will be.

~~~

The nightmares were awful. Dead, unblinking eyes, spurts of blood. The screams of people being killed by our hand. I had gotten some kind of glimpse of what my life was going to be like in eight days time, but...this was a portion of it I would have rather not seen.

I sat upright, breathing heavily and squeezing my eyes shut, trying to block out the images.

"You fell asleep before I could warn you about the nightmares." I looked over to see Five lying on the bed beside me. Sunlight was streaming through the windows, and I assumed it was early due to the brightness of the sun. I shook my head, rubbing my hands over my face. I felt fingertips touch my shoulder, and I surprised both Five and myself as my reflexes kicked in and I grabbed his wrist, pinning it up against the wall. He raised his eyebrows and I jumped off of the bed, pushing my hair back.

"What...what is going on right now?"

"You're falling into the Mary that I've known for the past thirty years," He answered, "The future is catching up with you."I shook my head, pinching the bridge of my nose."Why don't you go take a shower, and I'll see if I can find something in my sister's room that will fit you." I nodded, and he led the way the the bathroom.

I got in and let the warm water run down my face, removing the last traces of drowsiness. In eight days...I become a murderer. I kill people. Innocent people! People whose mere existence, whose innocent, everyday actions are the only reason for their deaths! Even when I was living on the street, and got into fights I never had to kill anyone. But...then again, when the world ends...I suppose the rules change a bit. I sighed again, getting out of the shower and drying my hair. There was an outfit hanging on the back of the door, and I recognized it as the female version of the uniform Five was wearing. A pair of black shoes and knee socks resided on the counter beside it, along with a tooth brush.

I mean, I could have easily gone back to my apartment and gotten clothes but...to each his own.

I put the clothes on, brushed my teeth and tied my short hair into a stubby ponytail before leaving the bathroom and making my way back to Five's room, where he was getting dressed. He glanced up at me as I came in.

"Better?" He asked.

"Cleaner. I wouldn't necessarily say better." He nodded, seeming to understand. "Five?"

"Yes?"

"Do you..." I trailed off, leaving the rest of the question for him to figure out. He nodded.

"Yeah. I have them too. I just handle them differently. I'm used to them, and you're a better person than I am."

"I don't think that's true." I told him. "I know I don't know you that well, but...I know me, and I don't think that's true at all."

"Yes, but I know us both. Believe me, it's true." He stopped tying his tie, surveying the uniform I was wearing. "That looks good on you."

"Does it look good? Because I feel ridiculous."

"Comes with the territory." He stated. He reached up, pushing away a few stray strands that had fallen out of my ponytail, before stopping himself. "Sorry. That's probably weird for you at the moment."

"Weirdly enough...it's not." I said simply. "It almost feels familiar, like it's happened before, even though...what ever we have hasn't happened yet."

"Like it was always supposed to happen." He said. I nodded. "Come on. We've got work to do."