38.

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"It's a new dawn
It's a new day
It's a new life
For me
And I'm feeling good"

***

Harry and I just kind of stare at each other, this doesn't feel awkward, but the anticipation is deafening.

We are like a couple of virgins waiting to try things for the first time, exploring things with each other that are brand new.

I never thought at this age I'd have that feeling again, and while Harry is only 22, I'm sure he never thought he would either.

It's that innocent nervous feeling, where it's all about discovery and learning with each other.

Harry shuffles down to lay on his back, and I move closer to curl up against his side, laying my head on his chest, hoping the closeness will sooth both of us.

"You know, if you told me this morning,  that this is how my day was going to end - I would have told you to ease up on the drugs" he jokes, and I laugh.

"Tell me about it, I wasn't expecting it as much as you were"

"Over the moon about it though" he grins, and I watch his expression back, staring up at him.

"You're such a sap" I tease, and he pokes his tongue out at me playfully, before ducking his face down to peck my lips.

"Can I tell you something?" he asks, turning his eyes to watch as my fingers trace over his stomach.

"Go for it"

"M'nervous" he sighs "About touching you, it's intimidating. I mean... You've only been with women and they kind of have an advantage, knowing what feels good, how to please you and what if... What if I just disappoint you?"

I pause my hand on his stomach, dropping my brows.

I never thought he'd feel like that, or have to worry about this sort of thing, I thought I'd have to be the one worrying about disappointing him.

I lean up on my elbow to look at him, seeing him with a shy but worried expression and I hate that he feels insecure about that.

"Listen, I understand, I do. But believe me when I tell you, there's a tonne of lesbians out there that aren't good at what they do, sure they understand the instrument but that doesn't mean they play it well. Pleasing someone you're with is about caring, being attentive and wanting to please them, not just yourself. You don't have to be a girl to do that Harry, you could never disappoint me" I reassure him, but then tilt my head.

"I've never touched a dick in my life, do you think I'm going to disappoint you?" I ask, hoping this will get him to see my point.

"Never" he shakes his head quickly "Honestly I think you could punch me in the dick and I'd still say thank you"

I flop my head against his chest cackling to myself, he sounded so dead serious about that statement and it was adorable.

He rubs his hand up and down my back, chucking to himself under his breath, and I lift my head to look at him again, seeing him more relaxed and smiling now.

"So do you see what I mean now? You can't disappoint me, because it's you, that's all that matters" I say, lifting my brows at him.

Harry just nods in agreement, looking over my face fondly, and I give him a firm nod back.

"Right, so now that we've cleared that up, let Bigfoot out of his cave and show me how this thing works" I say, gesturing to his pants, and Harry blow out a laugh through his lips shaking his head.

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