My Love, My Drug, My Release

Chapter 44: What Do I Want?

"I think it's fabulous, and you're the only person I know who's skinny enough to pull it off."

She knew how to flatter me, so I checked the price tag. "Sixty quid?! They must be joking; it's a shiny dinner napkin!"

Anita laughed loudly at that, and the cashier stirred but didn't wake. "Don't worry, I don't plan on paying full price for any of this shit." With that, she grabbed a brown, fringe jacket and a men's fedora, popped the latter on her head and flung the former over her arm, strolling out of the store while I stood there, gaping.

I debated leaving the dress behind, but I didn't want her to think of me as a stiff, so I hustled after her before I got caught, adreniline flooding my veins. "What the hell?" I snapped at her.

"What, you've never shoplifted before?" she asked as though it were a common hobby.

"Of course not." I looked over my shoulder, half expecting a cop to come out of nowhere and arrest me, but it appeared we'd gotten off scot-free.

"Serves them right for having such ridiculous prices. Now come on, we're going to meet Keith. You can change in the car; he'll die and go to heaven when he sees you in it. Don't worry about Robert, he's very discreet." Her words set me on edge, but there was no maliciousness in her eyes, so I let it go.

While we drove, I removed my top and skirt, but the dress plunged so deep in the back, I had to remove my bra as well. "Oh crap, I didn't get shoes."

"I think your flats are cute, just take off your socks."

I felt ridiculous walking the streets of London in broad daylight in bare-backed, gold-sequined mini-dress, and kept my head down, watching my own shadow. It'd be different if I looked like Anita. She could wear anything and look like a goddess, while I looked like an awkward, gawky schoolgirl. 

Noticing my blueness, my companion pushing my fringe out of my face, smiling down at me. "You need to get these trimmed, they're covering your beautiful eyes."

Her words made me think back to that day at Pattie's salon, Clyde, the hairdresser, telling me that one day I'd outgrow my fringe when I was ready to grow up and not be a little girl anymore. "I'm thinking of trying a new style, actually, without these things." I parted my hair down the center to show her how it would look. "What do you think?"

"I think it's beautiful, my love." She leaned in and kissed me gently on the lips, two old ladies staring at us with disdain.

When we got to the church-side park where Keith told us to meet him, we saw the interview was still underway and waited to the side, the Stone throwing us a wink when he spotted us. "Sorry mate, but I've got to go."

"Wait, we still have a few more questions."

"And I've got two red-hot babes waiting for me, easy choice." He shrugged and stalked off, looking me up and down. "Nice dress."

"What about my hat?" Anita asked with faux-indignace.

He chuckled, touching the brim. "It's a bit big for you, darling."

"It's made for a man's head." She removed it, frowning at the pinstripes as though they'd just disagreed with her political beliefs. "I don't like it much anyway. Hey, camera-man!" She tossed the cap like a frisbee, and it nailed the guy right in the side of the head.

"Good aim," I noted.

The bloke turned, pointing the camera at the three of us, tapping the interviewer on the shoulder, but I couldn't see what happened next, cause we were on to the next adventure.

"As much as I love this dress, I need to get you out of it as soon as possible," Keith muttered on the way up the steps to his flat. 

I shivered, feeling his warm palm on my bare back. "Don't rip it."

"No promises."

He flopped onto the couch, pulling me on top of him. Since we were about the same height, our legs lined up perfectly right down to the tips of our toes, my chest pressed against his, his hard-on poking against the fabric of my dress. Keith laced his fingers through my hair, pulling it hard enough to sting, but I liked it that way. His mouth melted across my cheek like hot butter, reaching my earlobe, tongue poking around inside my ear, making me giggle.

The sound of the rotary phone spinning made us look away. "Who are you calling?" Keith asked his girlfriend as he lifted the hem of my dress.

"Mick."

"No, absolutely not, he's not invited."

"Why not?"

He glared and her, flicking his head in my direction purposefully. "Have a little compassion."

"I don't mind if Mick comes over," I said quickly, not wanting Anita to think of me as a wet blanket, and it worked: she smirked at Keith smugly. "But I don't know if Paul would be okay with it."

Keith groaned, rubbing his face in exasperation. "Stop worrying about McCartney! What do you want?"

I avoided his eyes as well as Anita's, thinking it over. The last time I'd seen Mick, he'd given me junk then fucked me up the ass. He was kind and gentle in the afterglow, but came off as cruel and manipulative most of the afternoon, especially in regards to Keith. I wanted to spend time alone with the people who truly cared about me, but I also wanted to see Mick again... or did I? Realization hit me like a punch in the gut; I didn't want to see the singer again, I just wanted to feel the way I felt that day- I wanted heroin.

Eventually, Anita sighed, tired of waiting for me to make up my mind. "I'll go to his place, since you clearly want Lola all to yourself." Her mouth was a tight line, but she didn't spare a glance our way, making me think she was more hurt than annoyed. "And I'll pick Marlon up on my way."

I sat up on Keith's lap, watching her leave. "Where's Marlon?"

"We left him with your mom so Mary and he could have a playdate."

"She's not my mom," I snapped automatically. He kissed my palm in apology, placing it against his chest, the warmth spreading all the way up my arm. "But she might be soon. She and Paul want to formally adopt me."

"Bullshit!"

My eyes snapped down to him, brows furrowed confusedly. "What do you mean?" 

He shifted me off his lap, sitting up so we could speak easier, face serious. "Paul wants to be your dad?"

"Well, I still have a father, but I haven't lived with him in a while; Paul and Linda are my guardians, my only family. It's reasonable that they'd want to make it official."

"No, it doesn't make any bloody sense!" He stood up, pacing back and forth furiously.

"Come on, let's not talk about this." I lifted my dress over my head, leaving me in just my underwear, but he barely noticed. Rolling my eyes at his melodramatic reaction, I stood up, taking his wrists in my hands to stop his pacing. "Keith, please, relax. They don't get any special power by adopting me, they already have full legal custody, this is more just a token, a way of letting me know I always have a home with them, it's purely symbolic."

"I don't like what it's symbolizing. I don't like the way they treat you."

The intensity of his gaze didn't make me want to jump his bones for once. Instead, it frightened me, making my breath catch in my throat. Desperate to escape this moment, I slipped his hand inside my underwear, shivering when his finger parted my labia. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I kissed him deeply. "I haven't orgasmed in days," I whispered against his lips. "Please."

I could tell he didn't want to let this conversation go, but I kissed him again, and he relented, wrapping my legs around his waist and carrying me off to his bedroom.

I'm pretty satisfied with how this chapter turned out, but I'm curious to know what you guys think. I never imagined Lo's relationship with Keith and Anita would turn into what it is, but I'm kind of loving it! While I was writing this chapter, I realized how I want a few plot points to unfold, and they're going to be happening really soon, I just need to make sure I get the timing right. So excited, big things coming...