Fool's Paradise || bnha.

.one

"Master emotions and you will be unstoppable."

That's the only memory you have of him. Your dad would often repeat the same lines to you like a broken record when growing up.

Not that you cared. He's already gone in this world. The only thing you can do is to cherish the words he would whisper endlessly.

You can't forgive yourself for standing there like an idiot.

"Y/n. Please, Y/n..."

You heard his voice echoing inside the empty house. Never had it been filled with such emotions until now. Yet, you didn't move.

It was filled with his agony as his soul was slowly tearing itself away from his body. You knew your dad was suicidal ever since finding his mountains of beer cans and needles scattered around the bedroom.

But you were too scared.

Scared to move, scared to confront your dying father, scared that you will be haunted by the horrifying memory.

"Y/n."

Again, your name.

"Y/n."

He kept on calling for you, wanting for his only daughter to be by his side until his last breath.

"Please, don't leave me  a l o n e..."

Instead of showing him that you didn't abandon him, forget him and leave him, you stood slouched over the wall. Worst thing was the anger you held onto him for forcing you to experience his death.

You will never forgive yourself. Nor will you forgive the world for pushing your dad to his limits.

"Master emotions and you will be unstoppable."

Even after death, his words continue to affect you.

An endless cycle. Despite other sayings your father has told you, this one doesn't leave your mind.

Like an annoying mosquito, the same words keep buzzing around your head.

You tried to distract yourself. Joining a club, making friends, drowning yourself with books and endless studying just so you don't go crazy.

But it never stopped.

It never will until you accept the truth that it's implying.

It got to the point where you were too tired to fight off the same thoughts.

You wanted to be free from the dark chains.