The Secrets of Cedar Creek

2 : Stolen Kisses

It's winter now.

Something has shifted in the air: you can feel it. It's like a thick blanket encompassing everything. It's the quiet whisper of anxiety. It's a murmur of something rotting. It makes us dark and sour. You can almost taste it: a metallic tang.

Cedar Creek will never be the same without Paige. It was once a beautiful place: it was the quiet town at the top of Mt Fallows. It was my home and my sanctuary. I should be happy to be coming back.

The continuous hum of the train soothes me. I've always loved the steadiness of them. I rest the crown of my head on the window and watch as my breath fogs up the glass.

I wonder about how my friends will react to my arrival. I feel guilt for abandoning Avalon. She lost Paige too. But if I focus on my guilt... I'll drown in it before I've even opened my front door.

A voice inside my head says I never should have left after the accident. Now all I have is more regrets.

He pulls me to him, the smell of cigarettes hanging in the air. "Stay here," he says.

I chase away the memories, thinking about what Auntie and Uncle would say if they knew I wasn't with my grandparents in Newhaven for the last three months.

I've missed them though, my auntie and uncle. As I step off the train, pulling into Cedar Station, I imagine their genuine smiles. Though In the small crowd, I can't see them. Instead, I hear the faint calling of my name in the distance. It's a familiar voice I know all too well.

"Rose?"

"Sylv..." my breath catches as he pulls me into an embrace – a reaction I wasn't expecting. The way he holds me so tightly makes me feel like he's scared I'll float away. "I wasn't expecting you," I say, trying to say the words firmly. I look up at him as we step apart. He's somehow taller.

"Your Aunt and Unlce couldn't get here so I offered to pick you up." He leans in and takes my duffel bag from me, eyeing me up and down. "Have you been eating?"

I roll my eyes. But he looks slimmer too. I know he's been effected as much as I have.

We walk together out of the train station to the small parking lot. I walk a few steps behind Sylv, watching as the muscles move under his shirt, the broken part of the heel of his shoe making uneven clacking sounds and his hand grip tightening around the handle of my bag, the veins up his forearm protruding. I dread the drive to East Elm, my suburb on the other side of Cedar Creek.

Even after three months of distance, I know nothing has changed.

I slip into the passenger side of the car. It's warmer in here. The air is painted as I breathe little puffs of clouds. I pull my scarf over my nose. Sylv steps in the car and turns on the engine.

"I see Cheryl hasn't changed," I joke about his truck.

"Some things never do," there's something bitter behind his eyes.

Fragments of memories filter through my mind. His skin on mine. Clothes on the floor. Stolen kisses. My heart lurches and pangs with guilt.

"How was Newhaven?" he asks, interrupting my train of thought.

"Distracting," I mutter, "how's Archer?"

"He's still in hospital."

"Everyone else?"

"May and Avalon are good, they're excited to see you. Jackson was supposed to pick you up with me but he's in detention and Cliff is working."

"How are.. things?" I ask. My eyes run down his features and settle on his sharp jaw, clenching and unclenching.