𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐬 | 𝐥𝐮𝐜𝐚𝐲𝐚 *on hold*

10 ➳ the strength in me

"my entire life, i let me being hurt define who i was. i will use all i have to forgive him, but i will never forget the scars he gave to my heart..."

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

maya:

our embrace lasted for a while. while he was sobbing, i let the tears roll down silently.  but then i saw riley turn the corner while wiping the tears from her eyes. 

i hated seeing her so broken and defeated.  although she had hurt me, i still care about how she feels.  it's just something that i've grown into doing. i know she doesn't care about me or how i feel. but who am i to let all of our memories go to waste.

i quickly let go of him and looked him right in his eyes. his green eyes that i could get easily lost in... like a forest. it was enchanting. and laced with each golden sparkle was a plead for me to be with him.

of course i wanna be with him. i love him. i'm so in love with him that i convinced myself that i wasn't. but i don't wanna get hurt again.

i saw his face getting closer and both of our eyes closing slowly. i could hear him breathing unsteadily from crying.

but this moment was cut short by the stomping of riley's wedged boots trotting right past us as she scoffed angrily.

lucas and i awkwardly made eye contact as we both contemplated to continue our little moment. but it was cut short for a reason. i guess it wasn't meant to be.

i walked away from lucas and made my way to school.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
a few days later

maya:

i haven't spoken to lucas since our little moment. but i was dying to let him know how i feel. how much i craved for him to show me his love and affection. how much i craved for his arms to hold me when i drift off into la la land. how much i craved for his silliness and seriousness. how i craved for his lips to be on mine.

at first, i never knew what to call this feeling. and when i finally knew, i was ashamed. but this feeling is something to be proud of. i feel this hope. this joy. this electricity igniting every time his eyes meet mine.

my name is maya hart. this is me. i'm a girl full of hope and i can't wait for my future. i'm a girl who is in love and doesn't care who knows it.

this is the true maya. this is my voice now.

i walked over to my mirror and for once, i saw that short little stack of pancakes smiling so brightly. so beautifully.

"you're back." i said to the reflection. she gave a slight laugh and replied with "i've always been here."

i even let a small tear slip. i knew what i have to do now. i got out of my window and started walking.
jogging.
running.
sprinting towards the house of the boy that i love.

i knocked on the door hurriedly. i just wanted to get this over with since i was probably going to embarrass myself. he opened the door finally and a little distraught since it was around 11 pm.

he let me inside and led me into the living room. his parents were out of town so i don't have to embarrass myself in front of them.

"why are you here maya?" he finally spoke up.

i took a deep breath and thought if i should just tell him how i feel.

"look maya, if u didn't have anything to say tha-"

"lucas, when i met you, it was so clear that we were going to be close. and meeting you on that subway was an act of fate. being one of your best friends was a choice. but falling in love with you was so far out of my control. i love you. so much more than words can describe. i know i'm young and sound so stupid to be saying this but you complete me. for once i like a guy who will actually be good for me. i'm not ready to forget what you did to me, but i'm so ready to forgive you." i've never said so much in my entire life. not even when i pour my feelings out to my friends.

we stared at each other for a while until it became apparent of how awkward the situation was. i just closed my eyes and sighed deeply. i stepped out of his window and climbed to the higher part for the roof.

i just stared at the stars. i was about to cry. i don't think he feels the same anymore.

then i felt a hand on my shoulder. i looked to see lucas slightly smiling at me. he pulled me closer as we both gazed at the stars. i rested my head on his broad shoulder as one welled up tear strolled down my face.

"i love you too. so much." i heard his soft voice whisper in my ear. i turned my head to him slowly.

we both leaned in. our eyes were closing slowly. until i could feel his breath on my lips. i smiled right before he kissed me. and i kissed back.

it was a moment of pure bliss. every little piece of hurt and agony in my heart was replaced by hopeful light. and so i called it love.

~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~

vote ➳ comment ➳ follow