"i tried to keep my balance, i tried not to fall. i tried not to fall back into him..."
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maya:
school was finally out. having to face my ex-bestfriends was probably the most awkward thing for anybody. i decided to not walk home today since there was a chance i could run into one of the six on the way to my apartment.
i walked about five minutes to get to the subway station. i sat on the wooden bench as i waited for the right train to enter. i looked all around me. it's been long overdue since the last time i went here.
the boy who i called weasel who used buckets as drums had grown a beard. he wore the same blue beanie but more sophisticated clothing. his hair had grown a few inches longer. and his black combat boots seemed to become more matte and dull.
i saw the woman gretchen and her friend swaying their hips as they walked by. they seemed to grow a few inches taller if it was even possible. they dressed like an early 2000s r&b superstar but had today's modern instagram makeup. i giggled a little as i remembered when they reminded me of my posture the first day riley went on the subway.
i saw the woman that we called crazy-hat had given them up and wore normal clothing. i don't think she recognized me since we made eye contact but she looked away as if i was a stranger.
i saw the umbrella stand that me and riley had as our history project. it was down to three umbrellas, and one of them had a few rips. the logo on the front of the stamp had faded away. i could make up riley's name, but i couldn't see mine. it had disappeared.
soon the train came and stopped right in front of me. i grabbed the same pole the me and riley held onto the first day of middle school. i waited about two minutes for the train to get super crowded. i looked around once again at the posters on the walls. some were a bit ripped up while the others held an intricate design of the fading ink.
i turned right behind me to see lucas sitting in the same seat he was in when we met. i stared at him while he tried to start a long chapter book. i watched as his eyebrows furrowed trying to understand what he was reading.
suddenly, the train shuffled a bit causing me to grip onto the pole until my knuckles turned white. i tried to stay still so that i wouldn't end up how riley did without someone even pushing me.
and the train shuffled again, but a bit more rough. my hand slipped right off as i fell back onto something. i looked up to see that i was gripping onto the blue hoodie of lucas.
he smiled when he saw it was me. his eyes held a sparkle that i've never seen before.
lucas:
i felt the train shuffle a bit, but it didn't do much to me for i was sitting in a seat. i felt the train shuffle more violently this time, and then a beautiful blonde girl ended up in my lap.
why does this always happen to me?
the girl looked up, and i saw the blonde beauty. i felt the smile forming on my face as my eyes lit up. she looked a bit different though, she looked like riley.
i won't lie when i say that i had no feelings for maya. in fact i had fallen so deeply in love with her. but i still chose riley.
those feelings aren't gone though. i still feel some tug on my heart as i stared into the eyes of the blonde beauty.
but her eyes didn't sparkle like they used to. they seemed to be filled with dullness, hurt, and betrayal. this isn't the maya that i fell in love with.
suddenly the wheels of the subway squealed as we were halted to a stop. she quickly got off and out of the train. ~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~
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