Sentilia

Chapter 17

I opened my eyes to an emergency corridor. I knew exactly where I was even if I had never seen this place before. I was lying on a bed; on the sides were metal poles. I looked up and saw three people running alongside my bed, throwing anxious glances at me. I could hear a beeping sound near me, and as I looked up to the ceiling, to the flashing lights going by, the beeping sound became an ear-piercing, continuous sound.

I woke up.

At first, surrounded by covers, I wasn't quite sure where I was. I lifted all the bedding, and found myself in my room. I had finally, really woken up.

The dreams were so vivid that every time I woke up, I felt displaced. Like it had been years ago that I hadn't been in my room and seen my family. I was exhausted, and because this dream had been so long, it took me a few minutes to truly have crystal clear thoughts again. And though I was still tired, I fought to keep my eyes open, to stay awake, because I did not want to fall asleep again. I was certainly a little troubled about the last part of my dream, but all I could think about, rather than the hospital, was the kiss.

When I looked around my room, it was still its ugly pale grey; it actually looked worst than it usually did. I tried to push the thoughts of my dreams aside for a while, live in the reality of my world, even if I knew I wouldn't succeed longer than a few minutes.

It was morning outside. I got up, got dressed and fetched breakfast. It almost didn't seem natural. Maybe I was expecting a handsome man to appear and serve me the breakfast he had just cooked.

Now that I was awake, I seemed to prefer Kleio considerably, long for him, more than I did for Elis. Maybe it was because Elis had hurt me. Maybe it was because Kleio was safe; he was someone I could count on. Plus he made me laugh, and feel good about myself. To me, it was clear that K would be the best choice.

My perspective awake was very different than when I was dreaming.

I ate my breakfast alone, pondering my feelings, and my parents weren't up when I left either. I had put on some light clothes—and the only coloured t-shirt I owned—just because they felt better now.

I headed to the library offices to work, because I didn't want to stay in the apartment today. As usual, I met no one on the way there.

When I came back home, I was walking along the corridor to our apartment, but instead of stopping in front of our door, I stopped in front of the Clipperd's'.

I hesitated before I pressed the screen that would notify them of my desire to enter. A second passed and it was long enough for me to regret having stopped here at all.

"Hi Maxine." To my relief, it was Robyn who was at the door. Her parents seemed to be out; perhaps it was their job that had required them to be on location for the day. Robyn wore a curious expression and didn't seem to make an effort to hide the shock on her face.

"Hi, um, can I come in?" I asked, hesitantly.

"Sure," she stepped aside and I walked in. She didn't close the door behind us. Suddenly, I noticed she was clasping her shirt, and glancing towards the corridor.

"Is everything alright Robyn?"

"Yes, yes, everything is fine. Why don't we sit down?" She sat down at their dinning table and I followed. Their apartment looked different in the light of day. It seemed brighter than ours, although it was similar. The chairs we were sitting on were bright red, and that wasn't something you saw everyday.

Robyn interrupted my scan of the kitchen: "So what brings you here, Maxine? I must say I'm surprised. You don't come over very often." She smiled politely, but I still felt guilty somehow.