DREAMS WORTH CHASING (Complete)

CHAPTER TWENTY EIGHT

Zainab

I groaned and got out of bed, holding my head in the process. I've been having a throbbing headache since yesterday, it aches so bad that I thought it would fall off. Entering the bathroom, I had a long hot and refreshing shower. I emerged from the bathroom and wore a long lace gown with a stone embedded turban.

Abdulmalik had left for work earlier on after making sure that I ate breakfast, which he made by the way. I took my drugs and then he tucked me to bed. He's such a caring and affectionate man, just the type I always pray for.

I settled on the dinning area and had a cup of tea.

Placing the last washed plates, I sat on the chair by the kitchen island and started thinking about life, about what had happened and still happening in our 9 months of marriage. Lack of pregnancy. Ever since my wedding clicked five months, I've been receiving phone calls, both from family members and friends, asking if I was pregnant yet. The mere thought of it makes me want to punch someone or something.

People have problem, I mean problems. How does me being pregnant their concern, I mean, even if I give birth, the child is mine. It'll be with me through out his or her life, how does it concern them then, since they weren't the ones to cater for him. I'm also disturbed about the pregnancy issue, I also want a baby. Whenever I see babies, a lone tear escapes my eyes.

Whenever I'm in sujjood, what I never forget to pray for is me getting my own child, at the right time and a pious one. Though Abdulmalik had told me to stop worrying myself about it, but I can't, I simply can't. Not with the way that I always get constant reminder of me still being childless after 9 months of marriage.

What I am mostly worried about now is his side of the family. We were chatting with Maryam yesterday when she suddenly asked if I was pregnant, I was so surprised with her question. I mean, who is she? My husband? I told her that I wasn't and she was like 'are you serious?' and then like a struck of lightening, she was gone. She went offline and didn't speak to me again.

That got me really worried, what would happen if I went to Maiduguri? I always ask myself this question. I haven't called his mom in two months now for the fear of what she might say to me. Another thing that got me worried is, mom also asked me, I mean she literally did. She once told me that she gave birth to me ten months into her marriage.

But then again, everyone's destiny is different, when the right time comes, I'll also have mine. Speaking of which, I hadn't seen my period last month. I told Abdulmalik but he brushed it off, saying maybe it was stress. It really made me angry, we've been waiting for a child all these months but he was thinking negatively. After snubbing him the entire night, he apologized, saying he didn't mean anything, it's just that things like this happen sometimes and he didn't want me to lead my mind to expectations and be disappointed.

He spent the whole night apologizing and promised to buy a pregnancy strip on his way back from work. I inhaled and exhaled slowly, rubbing my neck due to it's stiffness for sleeping on the head rest last night. I got up, brought out a clean pot, rinsed it and set to cook lunch.

Done with cooking, I transferred the food into the warmers, placed them on the dinning table, cleaned the kitchen and went to my room to have another shower.

***

I placed my prayer mat on the bed side after praying Asr. I quickly fixed my make up because Abdulmalik will soon be back and made way to the living room.

Settled on the couch, I turned the TV on and changed the channel to E!. I was watching KUWTK when I heard the door bell chime, I quickly moved to the door and unbolted it. It was my man.