Love... What Bullshit!!!

Part 29

"Dear Manik,

I don't know when r going to read this letter, but it is surely gonna be after I m no longer in this world.... 

I m tired Manik. Tired of trying to fool myself that someday I will find happiness. Happiness in this marriage of mine. I m tired of making myself believe that this is the man I love. This man, who played with my feelings and for married to me just for Money. Yes, that's right Money.... Just as he knew that my parents would give me off for my own happiness. And when he saw me rejecting at that money from them, he started showing his true colors.

I m tired of his constant greed. I m tried of being punished. I can't take this anymore Manik.... I can't!

It hurts Manik.... It hurts a lot when I have to hide all those evidences of his immense anger that he takes out on me and put on a smile in front of the mirror, or the family, or you!

And I m not telling u all this coz I want u to make him suffer. No, i don't.... Coz even if he was just after money, but I did Love him at one point with all my heart.

As much as I m grateful for Mom and Dad to give me this second life by adopting me, I can't deny the fact that it's u that I love the most in this whole world. Yes Manik, it's u!! You r my life and no one is above u for me. Not mom-dad, not my husband and not even this child that is growing inside me.

Yes, Manik I m pregnant. But I won't let this child come to this world.... No, I can't! I can't bear a child whose own father kicked me, right on my womb on getting this news. How can I bring on an innocent soul to suffer something that I m actually going through??

Coz even if I decide to keep him today, few years later He will grow up and call me a Coward.... A Coward who couldn't save him from his evil father. No Manik, I'm not a coward... I m strong enough to get out of this hell! And I want u to remember that.... I won't let my child face any of this.

Manik, this letter is gonna be one of the many secrets that the two of us have shared in all these years, plz do not mention this letter to anyone else. I don't want it to be stored in some crappy file at the police station as a Suicide Note. This is not a suicide note, it is just a goodbye letter from a sister to her brother and I want it to be treated like that.

I didn't want to leave this earth with no single soul knowing the exact truth. And that is why I m writing to u today! Promise me to keep this Just to Urself Manik.

I love u Manik.... And I m proud of u!
I hope u grow up into a wonderful Man, fulfill all ur dreams and make Mom-Dad proud. They r our parents Manik, they always wish for our good, listen to want they say and do so..... Maybe, I would also hv been at a better place if I did that. They weren't in agreement to my marriage at first, but then they gave in for my happiness and see, where it got me today. Listen to them Manik, don't let them down!!!

Touch the sky with ur glory and make the world yours. Fall in love with someone to stand by u in all ups and downs of ur life, and just remember that I m up there watching over u and having that proud smile, shouting to the world that u r My Brother..

Lots of Love,
Ur Di❤"

Nandini had a stream of tears flowing out of her eyes by the time she finished reading the entire letter. She couldn't stop herself but cry at it.

Now she knew exactly why this entire issue had been so so sensitive for Manik. Coz even after reading the letter for 3 times before, she again read it with her eyes filling up with tears. She could only imagine the pain, manik would hv gone through at that point when he received the letter and even today.