Weekly Reflection

#8

"The problem with being the strong one. No one offers you a hand."

This quote is freaking true. I have amazing friends and family members but they go trough life's crap just like I do. The difference is when they go through their crap they may come to me to vent or seek advice but when i go through crap.. who do I have to turn to?

I know people already have too much to handle so I wouldn't go to them to add the bull crap to their already crappy pile. This is why this quotes is so true to me. I'm the "strong one" or your "shoulder to cry on" and because I have this title I don't have a shoulder to cry on myself. Perhaps it's my pride or my love of those around me that prevents me from seeking guidance from others. Who knows !!!! (It could possibly be both)

Basically it's like this, I'm the one helping everyone else carry their load of crap down the road of life but while everyone else is appreciating my help no one really sees that I need help too. So who's going to help me ?

If your like me and wondering how i cope, well I found something/someone to help lighten the load so I can carry it on my own. Well that's what I did before but now I'm not coping at all, only reacting and assisting others. Its hard yeah, of course it's hard. Life wasn't meant to be a walk in the park.

For me, my goal is to find a way to cope with the responsibilities and backlash of this title before I mentally and physically lose my fucking marbles. Sometimes everything is too much for me to deal and I feel stuck. Its almost like a weight on my shoulders pushing me down into quick sand. Of course I try to get back to safe ground but it's like the more I struggle to be free from the weight and obstacles the more damned I am.

I really try not to be gloomy in this book because life isn't about living in a dark haze of doubt and envy. However  as you and I both know, life isn't always sunshine in rainbows either.