How It All Started

Chapter 32- The Next Touch Down In Italy

"Alex, breath. Don't take sharp breaths like that, you're going to get lightheaded and faint again," it was true, I was already pretty lightheaded not to mention that I'm still crying. "You're having a panic attack Alex, breath," my arms seem to have their own minds because as I can't catch my breath my cries are getting louder, my arms are attempting to escape Shane's tight grip. Knowing that I want my arms don't stop, the pain in my chest seems to keep growing.

I have stage four liver cancer.

Her voice repeats over and over in my head. I just want to scream. Everything seems to stop in this moment, my arms stop moving, I feel like I stopped breathing, my loud cries have stopped though tears still freely flow down my already stained cheeks. My head slowly turns to Shane, his eyes are wide and almost looked surprised. His arms are still embracing me, "I'm sorry," I mumble as I let my head fall on to his chest.

"It's okay, you just slightly frightened me when you screamed, I thought I hurt you," his voice is soft and full of worry.

Shaking my head, "you could never hurt me," his soft lips kiss my temple lightly. "You know I didn't think I actually screamed,"

"Oh you screamed," he lightly chuckled. "I love you,"

"I love you so much Shane," I look up to kiss just under his jaw.

"I'll help you finish packing so we can go out and do stuff for the day," I nod giving him a tight smile.

Folding articles of clothing was never my favorite thing to do, in this case especially. I'm packing to go see my dying mom. After only about twenty minutes of finishing that up, I closed my suitcase, that contains probably too much. Going to the bathroom and grabbing to traveling bag, I put stuff in that I won't need until tomorrow morning. Being ready in my black leggings and a white t-shirt. Swiping mascara across my eyelashes for my last part of my not-so-normal makeup routine. Although I can already see it coming that I'm going to be wearing this much cover-up to hide the fact that I've been crying nonstop from the world. Shane walks into the washroom looking very cute. He's wearing a blue flannel that is wide open with a white t-shirt under, along with dark blue jeans. "Ready to go?" With the nod of my head his hand grips mine. Grabbing my green jacket, with Shane holding it open for me, I slip it on. While I'm adjusting mine, he's putting his coat on. I grab my brown knee high boots that have an inch heal adding my height. Once I'm done Shane is standing there waiting for our hands to connect. Taking my purse I put it over my head for it to rest on the right side of my body.

"Where are we going exactly?" I ask Shane as he leads me out the side door into the cold air of late October. The smile he shows as we continue to walk down the street tells me that he isn't going to fess up. I actually thought we were driving somewhere when he told me he had an idea of something to do.

"Well, I don't exactly have too much planned but I thought it would be nice to walk around downtown for a bit and when we got hungry we could eat," he explains, swinging our hands back and forth.

"I like that idea," Smiling up at him as we walk through the semi-busy streets of downtown.

Walking through the streets hand-in-hand getting pushed together everyone once and awhile from the streets getting busier. Walking in and out of stores looking through clothing, making each other try it on. Shane so far has gotten more clothing than I have which makes me giggle but he claims that he does need new clothes. When really I think he is just sick of his 'old' ones. Though I did pick out his new ones I have to say he looks very good in them. "Are you hungry yet?" Shane asks again for the third time in the past hour. Pulling out my phone I look at the time to see that it's ten to five. My flight leaves at eleven thirty tonight.