A Sense of Longing

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Arias P.O.V.

"So it started off with just me and my buddy from college Dani," Todd had a gleam in his eye, he had great joy in telling hilarious stories. It was like his air to him, he couldn't survive without something funny, just like Ezra was a writer, he couldn't survive without words.

God damn it. My resolution to stop thinking about Ezra wasn't really going so well. I mean, I couldn't even freaking focus on my boyfriend who is sitting across from me in a classy restaurant and had just bought me an expensive wine bottle. I really should focus more on him...

"...and that's when he found out about his pants!" Todd finished, expecting me to laugh.

I blinked and realised I'd zoned out. So much for focusing. I quickly chuckled to cover myself and tipped the glass up to my lips. Glug glug glug glug glug glug glug...

Todd began telling another story, only after giving me a curious stare.

Glug glug glug...

God, all this alcohol consumption, I was becoming Ezra.

God, I just thought about Ezra.

God, I can't stop. Ffffffffffffuuuuuuuuu-

Wait. Is that Ezra?! That man looks so much like him, I'm going crazy.

Far out Aria, get a grip. I have got to stop.

No wait... That is Ezra.

"Hey, are you okay?" Todd asked, sounding purely concerned. "You turned a little green? Are you feeling okay?" He reached across the table to check my forehead and softly touched my cheek.

See, Todd means well, he's so sweet.

Why can't I just love him and not watch how Ezra was sitting down and opening up his brief case to reveal stacks of papers as he called a waitress over?

"I'm just a little flushed... I'm going to hit the ladies actually." I got up in a normal manner, not trying to seem like I was in a rush to be doing anything suspicious - I'm totally not I swear. Maybe.

"Hi, excuse me," I tracked down the waitress who had served Ezra and felt a rush go through me just knowing he's in the room. "That man over there, do you happen to know what those papers are?"

"He's dreamy isn't he? Um, I think he was grading them, either that or editing them. Can I get you anything?" I shook my head in reply and thought about the new revelation.

He found work here. Either that, or he brought work over from Rosewood. Both ways means he was prepared to stay. Did he stay for me?

I was starting to feel sick. Just a slow boil in my stomach so far. But it was going to end up getting worse, plus I've had too many glasses of wine, that contribution would of done my stomach wonders.

Starring at Ezra, I knew he didn't know I was going to be here. He was completely immersed in his work with his eyes concentrated on the words before him. I missed seeing that look in his eye, and seeing this reaction when he would read. Honestly I thought it was one of the cutest things about him, and I forgot how much you could miss the little things about a person.

The way he used to place his hand on my thigh under a table when we'd be having a dinner with my parents. Or when he would laugh while cooking because he'd always think back to a good memory while he had time to think. And when you'd ask him what he was laughing at, he'd always tell his stories in such depth and detail that he'd end up over cooking whatever was unfortunate enough to be in the pan. But it didn't matter, he'd always make me laugh, every time. Because every time he'd draw me into him.

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