You, Always

Chapter Five: Hate Him?

He frowns while I start to laugh and almost immediately his frown changes to a smile as well.

A genuine one, no small smiles, no smirks, an actual smile.

I stop laughing and smile back. I don't know how long we were staring at each other for before I broke the eye contact but I don't miss the small sigh that escapes his lips after.

After a few more jokes, we've finally finished our meal and Cole drops me off back home. I ask him to drop me off at the top of my street because I don't want Josh's stupid questions again.

I still hate calling it my home because I feel as though I'm betraying my mum. My home was with my mum when we used to have a movie marathon and eat junk food. But I even just said it myself, It was my home—not anymore.

My eyes spew with tears and I quickly wipe them away before walking in. I see Nadia rush down the stairs before running back to the kitchen probably getting dinner ready. "Hey, honey!" I hear her call to me.

"Hey, I'm just gonna go upstairs. I've already had dinner." When I get upstairs Josh comes out of his room at the same time.

"Mum's just about to do dinner."

"I know, I've already had it." He frowns.

"Oh, who'd you eat with?" Shit.

"Erm, just Mia." His frown deepens.

"I know you're lying, you didn't go and eat with Mia." How would he know if I ate with Mia or not? It's not like he was with either of us.

Walking past him, I head to my room and the first thing I see is the photo album I had done of me and mum. It's on my desk and I grab it, getting comfortable on my bed getting ready to look through it.

I remember printing all the photos almost a day after her passing. There's a photo of us as the cover of the book as well and as I turn each page, I recall every moment that they were taken and that's when the tears start to fall.

I close my eyes, holding the album into my chest.

"You'll remember that I'll always love you, won't you?"

Just the thought of her voice makes me smile but it makes me feel like I'm there all over again. Like I'm at her funeral.

"My mum is—was—the best person I knew. Have you ever come across someone who has a soul too beautiful, too extraordinary for this world?"

I remember this one time when I had a really bad day at school, I had an argument with my best friend Jess, and when I got home I burst out crying. My mum was by my side within a second, I'd say that was her best trait, the way she cared for others.

"Oh honey, it'll be fine. You've had arguments like this before and you've both stayed the greatest of friends." I look up and smile at her whilst nodding.

"I love you, mum."

"I love you too," she says, smiling. "How about I get the junk food and you pick a movie?" I laugh a little and hug her once more before searching for the remote.

After a thorough look on Netflix, mum comes back in with her hand filled with a variety of different chocolate and crisps.

"Oh and Mandy," I take my eyes off the television to look at her. "I ordered pizza as well." She admits sheepishly.

My real name is Mandy but she was the only one who called me that. I hated my name with a passion but when it was her who called me it, it was different. So from a young age, I settled for Andie instead.

I run my finger across a photo we took when we went to England and mum asked for a passing stranger to take a photo of us in front of the big ben.

When I blink a few more tears fall but this time onto the photo and I carefully pat them away being careful not to ruin it.

******

I rub my eyes, trying to rub the sleep away and it doesn't work. I must've fallen asleep unintentionally, hence why when I look at the clock it's only 5:20 am. I quickly make a bowl of cereal and grab an apple before I leave the house.

Let's hope that Josh doesn't need the car to get anywhere too early because it won't be there. It's not like I'm just taking it, Nadia said I can borrow it whenever I need to plus, I left him a note. What else could I possibly do?

Just took the car to visit my mum. I'll be back in time for school -Andie

I leave making sure to close the door quietly and start the engine. The roads were extremely quiet so I got at the cemetery quick and easy.

As soon as I get back in the car I check the time and it's 7:10 meaning we should have plenty of time to get to school without being late.

Once I get back, Josh is eating breakfast and everyone else is out of sight. Maybe Nadia had to leave for work early this morning.

"Hey," He smiles "what time did you get up this morning to have time to go to the cemetery?"

"Just over 5, I had an early night that's why."

"Why did you lie yesterday?" And we're back to this...

I only just hear the question as the clashing of the plates in the dishwasher nearly overpowered his voice.

"I didn't lie, I twisted the truth," I respond, shrugging nonchalantly.

"No you didn't," he turns round to look at me, obviously hoping the eye contact would make me confess. "'Twisting the truth' means what you said was partly true, but what you said was a complete lie."

"Not that it's any of your business anyway but I was with Cole." You can hear the bitterness in my voice.

"I knew it! Saying you were with Mia was bullshit." I roll my eyes, huffing.

"How would you know if I was with Mia anyway?" I ask, crossing my arms.

"Doesn't matter about me, I thought you hated Cole." He sighs changing the subject back to me, I'll bring this back up to him later.

"We were finishing our project and stopped for food after. Can we stop speaking about this already?" He eyes me suspiciously but agrees.

Just because he doesn't like Cole doesn't mean I can't speak to him. He thought I hated Cole?

I don't hate him.

That's definitely not the case.

>>>>>>

AUTHOR'S NOTE:

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