Almost Lover (Harry Styles) - Book 1

Chapter 64: Emotional

"Let's just leave it what it is for now okay?" I answer, praying he doesn't make a deal out of this.

"And what is it exactly?" He asks, raising his voice.

"God Harry, I don't know.. You seem to forget this all really just started between us."

"No it didn't." He defends our relationship, "This is fucking ridiculous Ava."

It's sweet that this means so much to him, but I'm so stressed out over the threats from my parents that I can't deal with anything else right now. The more public we take this the more serious they are going to think we are, and the more they will hurt Harry to try to hurt me. But I can't tell him that. He will just shoot the thought down like its nothing, when I know it's far from that.

I sigh in relief as we pull up to our hotel. Harry grabs our bags out of the trunk and drops mine to the ground in front of me. Well thanks for being such a gentleman I think as I follow him inside.

Harry puts a fake smile on his face for the man at the front desk.

"How may I help you sir?"

"I need one room for this evening only.... Oh wait, let me find out if my GIRLFRIEND would like her own room." He turns to me, "Sweety, would you like to stay with me or would like to pretend we aren't together and get your own room?"

I shake my head at his sickeningly sweet tone.

"Of course I don't want my own room." I say quietly.

He narrows his eyes at me before turning back to the desk, "Well there's a first time for everything."

I feel hurt and anger all at once. My weekend has already been total shit without having to deal with this. I lost the one woman who ever really cared for me. Basically the woman I viewed as a mother. And I'm so close to the point of cracking already without this added on.

I do feel terrible that I can't commit myself to him yet, but I think my past experiences have earned me the right to be a little wary of entering into any relationship. I don't say a word as I turn and head for the door, slinging my bag over my shoulder.

I walk outside and start heading down the street, trying to figure out what I'm going to do. I pull out my phone and quickly send a text.

To Liam: Please tell me you are back in Amsterdam.

~Yeah, just arrived this am.

To Liam: Thank god. I just flew in. My weekend has been horrible and I'm in need of a rescue at the moment.

~Well good thing you texted Batman then ;) Where are you? I'm in the car now, I'll come pick you up.

I text him the address and hit send as I feel a hand on my shoulder.

"Save it." I spit, without even turning around.

"Come back to the hotel. I didn't get you your own bloody room." Harry says, turning me to face him, "Don't be so emotional."

I can't help it as I burst into tears. Why am I always crying around him!? I hate crying in front of anyone. And now here I am, out on the street, crying my eyes out.

Harry looks shocked as I fall apart in front of him.

I keep my voice low, so no one else can hear me, speaking in between my silent sobs, "Don't be so emotional? You do realize I just lost my mother basically right? Being in New York alone was hard enough for me, every building I see in that city reminds me of something I've been trying for months to forget. And to top it all off, I am blatently reminded how much my own parents hate me. And has it slipped your mind that this is just weeks after I am attacked in my hotel room by my ex husband who took it upon himself to remind me of the one thing he took from me that I can never EVER get back?"

Harry opens his mouth to speak, but no words come out. I can see the hurt in his eyes. He knows he's fucked up.

I shake my head at him as I continue, "So I'm sorry if I don't care about making this 'official' right now. And I'm sorry if that hurts your feelings. Making an announcement to the world that we are 'boyfriend and girlfriend' doesn't really mean shit to me right now. I know what we are and I know how much you mean to me, which is everything. You mean everything to me Harry. But right now I'm dealing with a mountain load of anxiety and pain from my entire fucking horrible past being thrown back in my face. So please excuse me for being emotional. I'll remember in the future to not bother you about any of it."

Harry's eyes are red as I quickly turn around, finding Liam standing a few feet away from us. Great! Just great! By the look on his face I know he heard everything.

"Can we go please?" I ask, wiping my eyes under my sunglasses.

He nods and a worried expression takes over his face as he looks past me to Harry. I hate getting him involved in this. I was hoping he could just pick me up without even seeing Harry.

"I totally understand if you would rather me not go with you. I'll just call a cab."

"No," He takes my bag from my hand, "You aren't leaving here alone."

Liam opens up the door of his range rover for me and I slide in. He throws my bag in the backseat before climbing in behind the steering wheel.

I don't look back as we pull away from the curb and head down the street.

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