Sweet Obsession

Sweet Obsession 41

Tumingin sa akin ng kakaiba si Zamiel matapos ko sabihin ang mga katagang yun. He was looking at me na parang ako pa ang may kasalanan, ano na naman ba balak nya?

"I'm sorry." he muttered after a moment of silence. "Don't worry, I'll make sure pure business na lang ang paguusapan natin sa susunod."

I looked at him and sighed."You better do that." I said. "Sana kung ano man nangyari sa nakaraan, kalimutan na lang natin." I added.

"Kasi kung ako ang tatanungin mo, sobrang saya ko na ngayon. Salamat dahil pinakawalan mo ko noon."

"Good for you then. " hindi nya inalis ang tingin nya sa akin kaya ako ang unang bumitaw.

"This is our closure I guess?"

"Yeah." he lazily said.

------

Zamiel's Point of View

"You deserve that Vezteros." Marcus said while sipping his drink. I close my eyes for a while and silently agreed.

He was right. I deserve this bullshit.

"Alam ko kung gaano kamali ang nagawa ni Hendriana." Marcus added. "But she doesn't deserve that cruelty from you. Hindi dapat ganon ang ginawa mo noon."

"On her birthday dude.." I just nod while Marcus is nagging again. "And she almost got rape and almost took her own life. Ang gago mo pare."

"Then now you want her back? Let me remind you again..girlfriend sya ni Peirce. Peirce is your fucking friend! You really lost it now Zamiel, nawala ka na sa katinuan."

"I know.." I simply replied.

"Please don't do anything stupid again."

I smiled bitterly at that.

Habang nakapikit ang mga mata ko ay naalala ko ulit ang mga nangyari noon.

"Do you want me in jail?" she asked without hesitation. I was stunned and don't know what to say.

Of course I don't want her in jail. Shes my baby, I already have a plan with our future. Why would I want her in jail?

She killed Felicity. I closed my eyes and remembered why all this bullshit is happening now. She is the cause of Felicity's death. I can't be with her. Malaking kasalanan ang magagawa ko kay Felicity kung di ko lalayuan ang babaeng pumatay sa kanya. Bago ko minahal si Felicity, kaibigan ko muna sya. Hindi kakayanin ng konsensya ko pag minahal ko pa lalo si Hendriana.

"Yun ba gusto mo?" I badly want you Hendriana, I really do. Pero hindi kaya ng konsensya ko na makasama ka. "Is that what you want?"

Bullshit Hendriana, bullshit. Do you really think this is easy for me? Everytime I see you, hindi maalis sa utak ko kung sino ka. Kung anong ginawa mo.

Even I love you, conscience is killing me.

"Just give me a yes or no."

Hindi pumasok sa utak ko lahat ng sinasabi nya pero binigay ko ang sagot na alam ko hindi totoo.

"Yes." damn no. I don't want you in jail.

"Of course, as you wish." she said full of misery. Her eyes looked so sad and I really want to hug her.

"Can you go now?" please leave Hendriana. Baka bawiin ko lahat ng sinabi ko at itakas ka kung saan. I'm begging you, leave. Baka makalimutan ko na may pinagsamahan kami ni Felicity at yakapin ka ng mahigpit.

Lumabas si Natasha sa pintuan at mas lalo ko nakita ang pagiging miserable ni Hendriana. I want to tell her this is a misunderstanding at kahit kailan hindi ko sya ipagpapalit kay Natasha.

"That thick face bitch, how dare her!" Natasha shouted pagkatapos umalis ni Hendriana. Napintig ang tenga ko sa sinabi nya kaya I looked at her like I'm gonna kill her.

"Don't call her that."

"Pinagtatanggol mo sya? Gusto mo tawagan ko ngayon si Shina at sabihin kung sino nakapatay sa kaibigan nya?"

I clenched my jaw. "Stop messing around Natasha."

"Is Hendriana so precious to you at kaya mo akong halikan kahit kapatid lang ang turing mo sa akin?" she said while smiling. 

"Ano kayang mangyayari pag nalaman ni Shina ang—"

"Shut the hell up!" I firmly said. "I did what you want right? I fuck you already so leave Hendriana alone."

"Then let me use your phone."

Hindi ko na pinansin ang huling sinabi nya. Lumabas ako ng condo at pumunta sa tahimik na lugar.

Hindi ko alam na pagsisihan ko ang pag alis ko ng condo. Hindi ko alam na may mangyayari kay Hendriana. Hindi ko alam na gagawin yun ni Natasha. I should have bring my phone that time! Sana ako ang tumulong kay Hendriana. Hindi si Peirce.

"You hate me? Guess what mister Vezteros, the feeling is mutual now. "

I was stunned. I don't know what to do. I didn't do anything wrong this time. The one she texted is Natasha and not me, sa tingin nya ba talaga ay di ko sya tutulungan pag sinabi nya yun? But what should I expect? Sinabi ko na lahat ng masasakit ng salita sa kanya. I didnt mean those hurtful words but my anger.. damn it

"You killed someone, you don't have the rights to hate me. Dapat ay makulong ka" what did I just say? fucking hell, I mess up again. I should comfort her at wag sabayan ang galit nya!

"The real killer here is you Zamiel."she said while seriously looking at me.

"Pinatay mo yung Hendriana na walang ibang ginawa kundi mahalin ka."

I looked at her with a guilt on my face. I didnt say any word because I know somehow... I deserve her hate.

I deserve her hate. I should put that on my mind. I want her to be with me but I really can't. Everytime I look at her, the small voice on my head won't stop saying that she killed my friend. She killed Felicity.

I need time to accept it. But its too late.

"Ano na naman ba?"

Ganon na lang yun Hendriana? Aalis ka?

"What?" she angrily asked.

I was stunned for a moment.

How can she leave this situation? I just need time to cool down. I don't want her to leave, I just need time to finally accept everything. How could she..

I just need time because I'm also badly hurt. Alam ko nasaktan sya sa mga sinabi ko sa kanya. I'm regretting it. I will eventually say sorry so why the hell this happening.

"I said, don't come back anymore." I said I love you but you didn't hear it.

"Be gone forever." I said slowly.

You will be back right? Like you always do. We can fix this right? Fine baby, I'll give you time. Let's take a break from this toxic. We need to fix ourselves.

"Hendriana and Peirce are happy now. You should stop now Zamiel." Adam said while looking at me with pity.

That news took my insanity away.