I AM YOURS // JiKook (VERY VERY SLOW UPDATE-BUSY ㅠㅠ)

FOURTEEN

No matter how much I think of it, I still think it's wrong. Pretending to be Yoongi is me fooling myself. pretending to be Yoongi is me fooling Jimin.

But if Hoseok hyung is right, if the only way for Jimin to get better is by fooling him that Yoongi is still alive, that Yoongi's visiting him and taking care of him, that Yoongi is me, then I'm doing that for Jimin's benefit. For him to be okay. 

But after that, what will happen next? After he get better, how will we tell him that I'm not Yoongi? What if the second time I visited him, he'll realized that I'm not really the one he thought I was? We're taking a risk here. A risk that may help Jimin or worsen his condition.

One day has passed. One day of me being tormented. The night finally came and I'm still confused on what really my decision will be. I asked Namjoon hyung but he just told me that whatever my decision will be, I have to think it through.

I decided to tell Hoseok hyung my decision after seeing Jimin. Maybe I could decide on what to do if I see him one more time. I texted Hoseok hyung and told him this and he agreed to let me see Jimin.

I arrived in the hospital. Hoseok hyung let me enter Jimin's room. 

"Hi." 

I feel like I was going to passed out when it hit me that Jimin's awake. I immediately looked at Hoseok hyung and he just mouthed "he won't go to sleep". I'm expecting to see him sleeping nd not this. What do I do now?

"Are you really just going to stand there?" he asked. I once looked at Hoseok hyung again to ask for help and he just don't know what to do too.

Is Jimin really thinking I'm still Yoongi? He's awake. Last time I went here, he just woke up and the room is dark which probably made him think I'm Yoongi.

"I don't bite." he continued.

His statement made me want to cry right there and then. That, I used those words before to scare him. Back when I was still harassing him through texts. I did ruin him and I regret this every night. 

I looked at Hoseok hyung and gave a nod. I don't care if after Jimin got better, he'll hate me for pretending to be his late boyfriend. But I need him to be okay. I need him to get better. 

"Hello." I went to his side of the bed and sat on the chair. He looked at me and gave me a soft smile. How I just wish he's smiling at me and not at 'Yoongi'.

Hoseok hyung coughed which both caught our attention. 

"Jimin you need to eat now. It's passed dinner time."

I looked at him and saw him scratching the back of his head.

"You haven't eat yet?" I asked him.

"The food here sucks."

"But still Jimin, you have to eat."

"Can you buy me hamburger? Hoseok hyung doesn't want to."

I laughed and looked at Hoseok hyung. He mouthed "not allowed" and proceeded to sit on the couch.

"See. So please buy me."

"The doctors probably told Hoseok hyung that you still can't eat such food. But let's make a deal, if you eat what the hospital prepared tonight, I'll buy you a hamburger the next time I visit."

"Next time? You're not going to visit tomorrow?"

If his eyes can speak, it'll probably say "I'm hurt. I want to see you again tomorrow." But it's either I'm thinking too much or that's what really is going on in his mind but of course, it's Yoongi he wants to see.

"I mean tomorrow." I confirmed. "So deal?"

"No. I'm not a kid that'll make believe in such lies. Try harder." He laughed.

"But you should eat."

"You should taste the food here. It really sucks. After that, tell me what burger we should buy."

"And if it doesn't?"

"I'll eat it."

"Deal!"

We asked for his dinner and I took a spoonful of the soup.

It tastes bland.

"So?? Are we going to order hamburger now?"

"No. It actually tastes bland but it's still edible. You should finish eating it."

"What?! No! It sucks. I want my burger."

"Jimin. Our deal is you'll eat this after I eat it. No one said about anyone buying hamburgers.

"But-"

"Eat now Jimin. The soup is getting cold."

"Argh! I hate you." He made faces at me and proceeded to eating his food.

Cutie.

Please always stay like this.

***

Really slow updates due to my work life. I'm so sorry. I barely have time to catch up anything about Bangtan. That's how busy I am. T.T All of you who are now working, be thankful to your HR personnel. Our job isn't easy. T.T