Chapter 1.

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"So how you've been?" My shrink, Dr. Robert asks.

"I'm going to be straightforward Arthur-" I say using his first name.

"-I feel like ending my own worthless life. I feel like overdosing on a bunch of random pills or maybe slitting my wrist. What sounds less painful to you?" That was the bipolar symptoms kicking in.

He shifts in his chair, clearly uncomfortable with what I said.

"Feeling uncomfortable Arthur? Hmm?"

He doesn't answer, just writes down something on his journal.

"What the hell do you even write on that journal of yours?"

"Your mom tells me you picked up a habit of sneaking up to the roof at night. You're not planning on jumping are you?" He asks.

"Of course not. That's one of my many escapes from this shit life I call reality."

"How?"

"I love staring at the stars. Ever since I was a little girl I've been hypnotized by them. They're so beautiful. I really hate how people take their beauty for granted and don't admire them as much as they deserved to be."

"So you won't jump?"

"No."

"On Saturday it's going to be a year since your fathers passing. How do you feel about that?"

"I feel freaking ecstatic." I answer sarcastically.

"I'm asking you nicely Ronnie." He says.

"Then I will reply nicely when you ask smarter questions Arthur."

"Have you been taking your antipsychotic medication?" He asks.

If there's one thing I admire about Arthur is that he can tell when you're lying, so I choose not to speak up since he knows the answer already.

"Explains a lot by your attitude towards me."

Regularly Arthur and I would have nice conversations. You can say he's sort of like family now. I hate when I'm a bitch to him, but it's not something I can control easily.

"What about the Zoloft?" He continues.

"No."

"Why haven't you taken your medication Veronica?"

"I'm tired of feeling like I'm fucking crazy. I want to be like the other people, who go out with their friends for fun. Who live for the moment instead of being cooped up in their room."

"But you're not crazy Ronnie, you just have a few glitches that can be fixed in time." He assures.

"I bet I'm not the first idiot you've used that excuse on." I mutter.

"Your mom also told me you've been writing music again."

"Yeah, I wrote a new song, it's for my dad."

"Do you mind singing it to me?"

"In fact I do mind."

"Why?"

"I'm only going to sing it to him and my family when we go to his grave."

My mom comes out to the backyard where we were at.

"Dinner's ready Ronnie. You're welcome to stay if you want Arthur."

"I won't be a bother Marilyn?" He asks.

"No bother at all." She replies with a smile.

For the past three months Arthur and my mom have been getting closer. To close if you ask me. Sometimes he'll stop by just to check on her instead of me.

"Break her heart Arthur, I'll break your balls." I threaten him.

"Stop being so moody." He says, flicking my nose.

"Idiot." I grumble.

He gets up from his chair, forgetting his stuff. Now I could find out what he writes down on that journal of his. I read through it quickly seeing as it's nothing but a bunch of gibberish. When I closed it something fell out. I pick up the piece of paper, taking a good look at it. It's a damn pamphlet for a Therapeutic Camp in Dallas. At the bottom of the pamphlet it said my name. Is this for me? What the hell am I saying? Of course this is for me. I fold the pamphlet in half, putting it in my back pocket.

Throughout dinner, Ivan talked about his last football game while I ate my spaghetti, glaring at Arthur at the same time.

'Dumb asshole trying to send me away from my family.'

"Ronnie? Sweety is something wrong?" Mom asks.

"Yes! In matter of fact, there is. That dumb asshole..."

I'm interrupted by Ivan's laughter.

"Well, he's trying to send me away to some crazy camp all the way in Dallas."

Mom looks down at her plate.

"Wait? Are you in this too Marilyn?" I ask, using her first name.

"Hey! I'm not Marilyn to you. I'm your mother." She exclaims.

"Answer my question mother." I say, emphasizing the mother part

"Arthur and I both thought it was a good place for you to go to. There's other kids going through what you're going through in that camp, you can open up to them. Plus, they'll be other psychiatrist you can talk to."

"I don't want to be in a room filled with other angry kids. I hate to say this, but I want Arthur to be my only shrink."

"Let's make a deal then." Arthur says, finally speaking up.

"What is it?" We all ask.

"You must promise to take your medication daily." He says.

"Deal. That's easy." I reply.

"Also, you have to go Ivan's last football game. It would be filled with people. If you can make it through that you can forget about going to the camp. Oh, and you are going with no one except for Ivan, who will only drop you off and bring you back."

"Fine." I say through gritted teeth.

"This is so exciting! You're going to love it Ronnie." Ivan says.

"Now give us a smile." Arthur says to me, smirking.

"I'm so tempted to punch your ugly face right now." I tell him.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Later that night.

Mom walks into my room with my medication and a glass of water.

"Here baby."

I swallow the pills then drown them down with some water.

"You know you don't have to go to the game if you don't want to." She tells me.

"But I want to, mom. I want to be able to conquer my fear of being on my own."

"You won't be on your own. Ivan will be right on the field if you need him."

"I highly doubt he would risk leaving his game if I have an anxiety attack."

"Yes, I would!" Ivan shouts from his room.

"Damn thin walls." I mutter.

"You need to cool it down with the cursing."

"Damn is not a curse word though."

"It is to me, now get some sleep." She says, kissing my forehead.

"I love you."

"I love you too, Ronnie." She says, turning off the light and closing my door.

"And me!?" Ivan shouts from his room.

"I love you too, Ivan!"

"I love you more!"

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