To Kill You With a Kiss

Chapter 10

Harry held the bottle in his hand for a moment and caressed the smooth glass. I wonder if I can find you inside this memory? If I were to enter my own recollection, would I find the real you inside it?He unstoppered the bottle with trembling hands and poured the memory back into the Pensieve. Then he plunged himself into the whirling waters and held his breath as the world around him dissolved.

The next moment, he was back in the headmaster's office of the past. Armando Dippet was sitting behind the massive oak desk now, speaking to a boy with black hair: "So you are..." He consulted a piece of parchment on the desk in front of him. "Elias Black. Welcome to Hogwarts, my boy. We are glad to have you with us."

Harry stared at the dark-haired boy who was sitting in front of the headmaster. That's me! I mean Elias... He is touching his hand to his forehead now, searching for that familiar scar... How bewildered he looks, as if he doubts that what he is experiencing is real.

Harry watched as the dazed "Elias Black" was sorted, and he saw what his memory self did not see: The young man with dark curls who walked in through the door. Tom! Oh, God, why aren't I looking up? There. Now I'm sorted into Slytherin, and I'm raising my eyes and seeing you... How you look at me, Tom!

Now we are walking out of the headmaster's office together. You are gazing at me with wonder, Tom, touching my scar... If only I could feel your hand against my forehead! Harry reached out, desperately, for Tom's hand, but there was nothing there. There is just the memory of you, touching the memory of me... I can see you so clearly, and yet you are nothing but a dream, a hazy memory...

Harry followed the memory of the boy who went by the name of Elias Black through the corridors of Hogwarts, into the Slytherin common room, where he was greeted by his new friends, into the green-hued dormitory, and onto the Hogwarts grounds. He stood silently by and listened as the dark-haired boy spoke to Dumbledore; he followed him to the dinner table in the Great Hall, back to the dormitory, and into his dreams the moment his eyes closed. When the boy who was called Elias was dreaming, the rest of the memory dissolved, and Harry stood still and breathless as the darkness and silver winds of Elias' dream whirled around him.

Harry trailed the memory of Elias through the few days he had been at Hogwarts; he walked behind him into Hogsmeade with Orion; he stood next to the cloaked and invisible Elias and Orion at Madam Puddifoot's, suddenly more than invisible himself. He strolled behind the memory of Elias and the memory of Tom over the moor in the golden sunshine; the edges of their robes got caught in the heather, but his own robes passed unhindered over the ground. Perhaps this is what it feels like to be a ghost... He reached out and tried to touch Tom again and again, but his trembling hand found nothing at all.

Harry laughed as he watched the memory of Elias try to kiss Araminta; it really did look terribly clumsy. He shook his head and smiled a little as Abraxas pressed a kiss against the lips of the recollection of Elias, and he watched, with a beating heart, the frozen expression on Tom's face as he caught sight of them. He saw Tom and Elias walk together through the hallway, and he watched them enter Tom's office together. His heart began to beat wildly as Tom stepped hesitantly closer to the bewildered dark-haired boy. He is kissing me now. Tom is kissing me... Oh, the torment and the sweetness of seeing him kissing me so tenderly, and not being able to feel it! Tom! I'm here!

But Tom could not hear him, and neither could Elias; they fell to the floor together, overcome with passion, and Harry watched them, flushed and breathless. He watched them lying in each other's arms as the night gradually turned to dawn, and he saw, witch a heavy heart, that Elias got up to leave. That's not your shirt, Elias; that's Tom's shirt you are putting on. But the recollection of Elias was in a daze; his glance lingered on Tom's face, and he paid no attention at all to what he was doing. The gift of a horcrux, a final kiss, and then the ephemeral Elias Black left Tom Riddle. Harry walked behind him to the Slytherin dormitory and watched him until he fell asleep.