Tennis Court (SVU Fanfic)

35 { Touch }

"I don't know," she told him. It was a lie. She wanted to do this, but the big R word wasn't escaping her thoughts. Should I tell him?

"Well, maybe you aren't ready. And that's okay," Elliot told her.

"But I am," she said. "It's...just..." her voice failed her.

Elliot brought a blanket around them, lying on his side, beside her. She snuggled close to him.

"It's just what?"

"It's...different. New." She was struggling to find words.

"Well, obviously. Anything new is scary."

"No, that's not it! I don't...I never..."

Elliot could tell Olivia was getting frustrated. "What's going on? Just take a breath." He brushed her hair through his fingers.

"Did I ever tell you anything about my dad?" she asked, all of a sudden.

"Your dad?" He didn't know much, but she did lie a lot. He wasn't sure what they real story was. "No. I figured he wasn't in the picture."

"Well, I guess you can say that. I have no idea who he is."

"Wait, seriously?" Elliot had no idea.

"I...he...he um..." She was at a loss for words. How do you tell the guy you're about to have sex with that your father raped your mother?

"You don't have to-"

"No! I just...Okay." She looked towards the pillow, gripping his right shoulder a bit stronger, and stronger the more words she spoke. "My...my dad...h-he...he's a rapist. My mom...is his victim. And I'm the result..."

She let go of his shoulder, releasing a breath she didn't know she was holding.

"Oh, Liv," was all Elliot could muster. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close. She let him do it, relaxing into him.

He knew, she thought to herself. He finally knew.

"You're not a victim. Please believe that."

She looked up at Elliot. "What?"

"You put up such a front, protecting yourself in any way you can. But from what? You aren't a victim. You're here for a reason and you shouldn't have had to live this life of fear."

"But I did. Because I know how the world works."

"But that's not how we work," Elliot whispered, kissing her forehead. "We do whatever you want. If you want to stop, it all stops, got it?"

She smirked. "That doesn't seem very fair."

"Well that's how it is. I don't see you pinning me down, forcing anything."

Olivia laughed a little. "I guess."

They fell into a comfortable silence. Elliot began playing with her hairwhile Olivia was tracing the lines on his abs. Her finger was gentle, slow, and soft. He stopped his motions to watch her study him. She seemed lost in her own throughts, and watching her entranced him.

It made his heart pound, her innocence, her interest, her presence, her being. He wanted her as much as she wanted him, but didn't realize it until that point. He moved his own fingers down to her chin, tilting her head so she'd look at him.

He kissed her gently and she returned it, pulling him over her. He held himself up with his left arm just enough so nothing would startle her too much. Their kisses quickly turned heated, as for usual. Olivia felt the kisses move to her neck and it brought the weakness back to her bones.