Alive [Lirry]

09.

After informing Jackie that he'd picked Harry up from Nick Grinshaw's house and avoided the trailing paparazzi, Liam had brought them at the hotel on his bike, (making Harry shut up, because yes, Liam had a bike and could drive it like a pro)

Slightly leaning on Liam, Harry fished for his key-card and swiped in the slot of his hotel room door. As Liam led a wincing Harry to his bed, he experienced a flash of deja vu from when he had transported a drunk Harry to his condo from the bar, after the near-death inducing bike ride.

Harry snuggled into his bed, sighing in relief. Harry winced as he shifted, cussing under his breath. Liam raised an eyebrow. "You okay?"

"Do I look okay?" Harry rasped. "Stomach hurts a bit and I'm just being a baby and... yeah. I'm fine. Thanks," Harry trailed off unsurely.

"Oh, that's good," Liam said awkwardly, as he sat down on the sofa. "Jackie had called me in such a damn hurry, and I thought maybe you got pummeled real bad or something. But you came out not too bad," he smiled as Harry snorted.

"Is that worry I sense in your voice?" Harry cooed, peering at Liam as he laid his head on the pillow. "And can I get an icepack?"

Liam snorted. "One, I'm not your nanny so get it yourself. And two, it's my job to see if you're hurt or not," he replied curtly in defense, making Harry start. Liam was concerned about Harry, but he didn't want to let Harry know that.

"Jeez, sorry I asked," Harry muttered, as he limped out of bed, still bracing a hand around his bruised stomach. Padding over to the hotel mini fridge, Harry pulled out a convenient icepack, lifting his shirt and placing the bag against his bruised stomach, sighing in relief. Sure, Nick had given him an icepack before, but this one felt even better.

Liam sighed, feeling bad. "Look Harry. I'm sorry about that. I just feel bad, because it's my job to ensure you don't get hurt and you got hurt--"

"Actually I'm the one who's so damn reckless, as you put it. It was your day off so don't blame yourself. And believe me, I deserved to get punched today," Harry spat, pushing back his curls by re-tying his bandana.

"Why do you think that? As far as I know, that other guy had hit you because of a misuderstanding--"

"Maybe, but I'm glad he hit me. Becausue I'm such a fucking idiot!" Harry groaned, feeling his buried anger resurface.

"You're confusing me. Should I leave or...?" Liam trailed off.

"No, stay," Harry murmured, making Liam swallow as he remembered the first time Harry had told him to stay after he'd brought a drunk Harry home.

"I'm so stupid Liam," Harry said, his eyes shining with tears as he locked them with Liam's. "I still have feelings for her. N-not for her, but the pain she caused me is still there."

Liam sighed. He wanted to leave, because this was not his place to stay. But he wanted to comfort Harry, Liam wasn't that empathetic. He stood up, tentatively taking a seat beside Harry on the bed, a safe distance away.

"Feelings for your ex?" Liam asked softly and Harry nodded, his face in his hands.

"Yeah. I just... I was such a stupid kid two years ago," Harry said softly, removing his hands from his face. "Marcel had found the perfect guy, and I was so damn jealous of my brother but of course I was happy that he found love. I also wanted to find love like him. And I was with Hilary back then and I- I don't know, I just forced myself to fall in love with her. Forced myself to make it work. But I didn't see how she was playing me, and I made a fool out of myself by being a hopeless romantic," Harry rasped, digging the heels of his hands in his eyes.

Liam stayed silent, but he moved closer to Harry, laying a comforting hand on his shoulder. This may not be in the job description, but Liam can afford to be Harry's friend tonight, because he needs one right now.

"And Hilary hates me now. I too hate that bitch with all my heart, but it hurts that I couldn't make her like me. It's stupid, I shouldn't care what that skank thinks of me, but I did. I think I still do, and I'm such an idiot for that!" Harry cried, as he leaned his head against Liam's shoulder, making him freeze.

"You can't make anyone like you Harry. It's impossible," Liam said softly.

Harry sighed. "I realise that now. But it's my nature. I can't change that. I was not this reckless before. But now I think, fuck it. Everyone thinks I'm an idiot, I myself know that I'm an idiot. So why think so much? I'm just going to live my life, and damn it if I get killed."

"That's a really stupid way to think," Liam spat. "So many people care about you. You can't be bitter about a few. And sure, you should live your life to the fullest but not be so damn reckless!" Liam said, moving away from Harry as he stood up.

"And now you're just worried about your job aren't you?" Harry narrowed his eyes.

Liam sputtered. "What? No! I'm offering you advice! Look, I was trying to be a friend, and I think I've offered enough advice for tonight. I'm just your bodyguard, dealing with this emotional shit is not my job, so I'll best be going," Liam said firmly, and Harry looked like he'd just been slapped.

"What are you, bipolar or something?" Harry seethed.

"Look who's talking!" Liam laughed. "I'm offering you advice, and you're accusing me of being selfish!"

"Aren't you?"

Liam threw his hands up. "Yes, okay. I am. Happy? I shouldn't even be here. I called Jackie. I dropped you in your room." Liam walked to the door. "I'm stupid for staying again," he said to himself. He glanced over at Harry who was biting his lip, hard.

"Comforting you is not my job, and neither is listening to your heartbreaks," Liam said coldly, though he felt guilty for saying so. But he had to. He couldn't let Harry get to him. He shouldn't be comfortable around Harry

"My only job is making sure you're not hurt, protecting your body. Good night Harry."

"What about my heart then?" Harry rasped, his eyes shining with tears as he felt deeply hurt with Liam's attitude. This isn't a big deal as he's making it. And Harry really needed comfort tonight but Liam just shoved him away for his professionalism. Asshole.

Liam closed his eyes as he felt his heart lurch at Harry's words. He took a deep breath.

"Go to s-sleep Harry," Liam said finally, his voice breaking, as he shut the door behind him.