Naruto Fanfic Reviews

Ninjas In The Pride

Before I begin the interview, I want everyone to know I'm not a bully and that anything I criticize is not to offend or hurt the author. We are only trying to help. I hope you enjoy and learn from this review and please remember you asked us to do this.

Ninjas In The Pride by Happyritas

Reviewed by Crowillow

First Impressions

I consider the covers of books to be a part of the story they are trying to tell. A cover is something to entice the readers to open the story and read what you've written. Your cover is alright but nothing special, I would almost consider it boring or bland. The lettering is almost blurred in and at the bottom, it is hard to read who it is by.

The title is interesting and it is what made me perk up when I began to read your story. I like how it ties to the plot of your story without actually giving anything away about it. Titles can be tricky but you nailed it.

Descriptions are utterly a pain in one's arse if I do say so myself because you neither want to write to little or too much. Your description was done rather well as it was short and simple without giving anything of the plot away.

Your Story's Plot and Structure

Writer's pull inspiration for stories from all sorts of places including other stories and movies. I've never heard of Root so I can't say much on that but for your story, I enjoyed what I've read so far for it. I like Diata in the way she breathes life into each sentence she speaks, I enjoyed the culture and clan you've created, and I was delighted to the fact you took the classic oc with ears and breathed new life to it.

The structure of your story is pretty smooth and the details you've written are nice though I feel a little bit more description could be added into the emotions of the people. Your break-lines were put in perfectly and I was hard press to find anything wrong with your grammar. The only two issues I found with your story is it seemed rather rushed in several places and the fact your oc has that stereotypical long name is rather annoying to keep reading constantly.

Final verdict on your story

Your story is going places and so are you, my writer. It's a wonderful story done with an interesting twist and I cannot wait to see what you come up with next. I might even finish reading it even though stories, where the oc is part animal, annoy me.

Cheers mate!

-Crow