Love Is Overrated (TAEKOOK)

Chapter Twenty nine-Goodbye.

~Taehyung~

You're one knock away, one knock away from being mine again, I'm scared I know I shouldn't be, but I am im staring at the door, hoping it'll just open,

you're my dream, the dream that's a hand movement away.

you're mine, i'm here to claim that,

yet why cant i just knock on the door, 

why do i feel like you're not mine? 

I feel like shouting out your name, for the last time, not being together has caused me so much pain, yet why now when i have the cure to stop that am i not getting it? 

im useless, and i have always been useless,

i can't supply you with love, when i cant even love myself, i can't even take one more step towards you, i can't take knowing, that you will always love me when i don't deserve it.

"i'm not the one he should be loving, am i?"

"love is love,"

"it's not love when it's not meant to be"

"this is coming from you, mister i havent left the bed in ages because jungkook isnt here, we're right outside just knock"

"jin hyung, i dont deserve his love when it's not supposed to be for me," 

"You do know what you're saying here?"

"I was wrong hyung, love is so underrated,"

"you'll only know you love him if you let him go."

"love is a type of thing you have to earn when you earn it,  and i don't want him to give me love when i didnt earn it, the love has got to come from me first,"

he nodded slowly, watching me with curiosity in his eyes, slowly walking away back to the car.

i turned facing the house,

"Goodbye Jungkook, i will love you always, maybe one day we can be together, I know im not the one for you, but you were right about me, i needed love, you were my love my only, the sun will never shine as bright without you in the picture, but i don't deserve your love, i don't deserve any love, I learnt that when i was younger, but i've just fully realised now, i hope you treat your real soulmate well, i hope you love them with all your heart, but please save a small place for me, if you dont i will chop your dick off, if you know how to be happy without me, be it, thats all i need for my happiness,

jeon  jungkook, i love you."

i swear i saw you that day, your beautiful black as midnight hair in the window, a tear stricken face, it haunts my mind to this day,everything about your perfect complexion never leaves my mind and how it was broken by me, you were the biggest and best chapter in my life, one that i never went back to, to reread, the big ending is soon, a fresh page to a torn book, i talk about you like it was you who left me, you never did, I was scared, scared of what our love could do to me,

and now  next week is our anniversary Jungkook.

the anniversary of our final break up.

and i don't know how to react or feel, but i feel one thing..

** OH MY GOD IT IS FINALLY FINISHED, Y'ALL PROBABLY HATE ME BUT I HAVE SOMETHING COMING, UPDATES SOON**