SHATTERED/Andy Fowler

Chapter 11: I'll Be Okay

With that Andy proceeds to walk out the door going to his home. I hated the feeling I got from it. Andy walking out, leaving me, again just fucking kills me. He promised, but this time I asked him to leave. It's not safe for us to be together right now. 

We are toxic for each other. We may not be later on, but we both have so much to refocus ourselves on, and yes it is the worst feeling you could feel, and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy, but I know one thing, This is and will be for the better. 

"Hey honey, are you alright?" Dad asks. 

"I'm not right now, but I will be. I have to be." I say my voice cracking. I turn to walk towards the stairs when dad pulls me into his chest. 

"It's okay to cry, it's okay to hurt and be weak. It's good for us sometimes. Please don't hurt yourself again. I beg you." He says. 

"I will be okay. Just doesn't seem that way right now." 

"Go get dressed for the day, you and I are going out." 

"But dad." 

"Just come on babe. Please trust your dear old dad yeah?" He says. I nod and pull away from my dads hug, going to my room to change. I put on a black long sleeve shirt, light blue skinny jeans with rips in them, and black boots. 

I curl my hair, do my makeup and then go back downstairs where my dad is waiting in the living room for me. I take a deep breath. I have never gone out one on one with my dad, not since the day we hung out before the wedding a long time ago.

Dad stands there in a gray long sleeve jumper, blue pants, and yellow tennis shoes. "You look very nice. Are you ready to go?" He asks. I nod at him. He wraps his arm around my shoulders, walking me out to his car. 

"What are we even doing dad?" I ask. 

"Well I wanted to talk to you about something." He says. I hum in response, signaling we will talk whenever.

"I hope everything is alright." 

"I think it is." He says opening my door for me letting me in the car and closing it. Brooklyn and I are pretty close, and I thank the Lord that he was brought into our lives, because honestly I can't imagine him not around anymore. 

I can't imagine my life without any of them, even Andy. Andy defined alot of my character today, but I thank him for it. He showed me what it's like to be loved, I also learned that no matter how far the two of us go from each other, we will always come back to each other. 

I love Andy more than anything, and giving him up, so that I could find myself, well that was the hardest and shittiest thing I've ever done but little did I know, it would be the best thing I have ever done. 

"Stop thinking so much babe. It's not healthy. Anyways, what I wanted to talk to you about, was if you would like to come on vacation with us. Your mom, Mikey, Luna, Jacquelle, Ashton, Harvey, Aphro, Sophie, Rye, and Myself. And you if you want." He says. 

"Where to?" I ask. 

"California, in the USA. You'll meet some of our old friends." He says. 

"I'd love to go dad." I reply. 

"Good. Wouldn't be the same without you." He says. I just laugh. 

"So what are we doing today then?" I ask. 

"Getting your passport renewed, getting your ID renewed and everything fixed up. Then when you're ready for the vacation, we will go out to eat, then we will have movie night." He says. 

"Where's mom going to be in all of this?" 

"She's going out with Jacquelle and Ashton. They wanted to go out with Harv and Aphro." 

"Oh. Sounds good. Well I hope they have fun." I say a little hurt. I liked spending time with Brook, but Aphro's my best friend, and nobody thought to invite me. That really bothers me to be honest.

"You don't need alcohol to have fun you know?" Dad asks reading my mind. "They were going to get trollied tonight and stay at a hotel. They didn't ask you because I told them not to. I wanted to spend the evening with you, catch up, see how you're doing you know." 

"Why do you care so much?" I ask.

"Because, I love you. You're my daughter and you mean alot to me. Your health and safety means alot to me. Your happiness means everything to me, because as a father, it's my job to love you and keep you safe." He says. 

"Thanks dad." I say tears running down my face. 

They always said broken hearts take you places.

But this broken heart?

It took me places alright, but they are painful. 

"Babe, it's going to be alright. I'm sorry that this has happened, and I know it sucks, but like you said earlier, You'll be fine, It just doesn't feel like it right now. Remember you have us others too." He says pulling into a parking lot of a courthouse. 

"I think this break was a big mistake, what if the person I truly am is with Andy?" 

"It's not. Maybe a part of it, but the real you is out here, and I know this is hard for you, but if it's meant to be, it will be. You know that." 

"I hate this feeling." 

"It goes away. When you start pushing it away." 

"How do you know so much?"

"I was your age once babe." He says. "Now clean up, we are here to get your things fixed up." I nod fixing my makeup, then walking into the courthouse, dad walking with me. 

"Good morning Ms. Good morning Sir. Could I help you?" A young lady asks. She's a little older than me for sure. 

"Yes, we're here to renew my Drivers License, and passport." I say. She nods beginning to help me. 

After about two hours I have a new passport, and a new drivers license. "Ready to go eat something love?" Dad asks. 

"Yes please." I say. He chuckles, but begins our drive to Nandos so we can eat a bunch of food. When we get there, I see Rye and Sophie, but they ignore us. I sit at the table with dad. 

He looks at me. "What are you looking at dad?" I ask. 

"My beautiful daughter." He smiles. "I love the sound of being a dad. It's too amazing." 

"Yeah? I'm glad. I love having you as my dad." I smile back. 

"Let's eat then go have a movie?" 

"Of course dad."

"You doing alright?" He asks.

"I'll be okay."