Eagle (A Loki love story)

Chapter 119

"Do not fret, my doe. All things will work themselves out in time. You'll see. I promise."

"But–" He pressed a single finger against my lips.

"Shhhh. It's late." He tapped the backs of my knees, making them bend, and laid me down, "Right now, you need to sleep."

Loki's POV

Mira fell asleep quickly once more, but this time I could not. Many of the worries she had voiced were also concerns of mine. What she truly didn't understand was how difficult it would be to get her scan done. And how unusual it was that the baby was still. Her pregnancy was already unusual enough, the last thing we wanted to see was more abnormalities.

Slowly, I removed myself from around her and knelt by her midsection and rolled up her gown. Her belly wasn't warm, but it wasn't cold, a safe temperature to be at. It rose and fell gently with every breath, however no matter how much a ran my hands over it there was no movement beneath her skin. I pressed my lips to her bump, as if that would change something, but it didn't.

"Oh, my precious child. We both love you so much. Why do you insist on troubling us so?" Silence was the only answer I was given, but I remained down by her abdomen for a few more minutes anyway before I shimmied up to the pillows and closed my eyes, forcing myself to go to sleep.

Mira's POV

I woke up slowly, the first thing I registered was the scent of Loki mingling with mine. For a moment, I was very comfortable and relaxed, until I reached out for Loki and found my den vacant. I sat up quickly, checking the clock on the wall by peeking through the curtain. It was about 5:30, too early for Loki to be up, but there was no light coming from anywhere else in the room. Concerned, I pulled myself to my feet and put on a robe. Natasha was in the kitchen, fixing herself something small and healthy, but she stopped when I came in.

"You're up early too?"

"Loki's not in bed."

"He came through here only a couple minutes ago. I don't think he noticed me."

"Was he ok?" She hesitated a moment.

"I don't really know what's going on with you two. I think it would be best if you talked to him about it. He was heading upstairs and had a light cardian on. If I didn't know better, I'd say he was going up to the roof."

"Thanks."

The trudge up four levels of stairs was long and hard, and I was more than winded when I reached the roof, but it paid off. Loki was there, just standing with his hands in his pockets looking out at the horizon. My movement made the stones shift and alerted him to my presence.

"Mira, what are you doing up here?"

"I woke up and you were gone. Nat said you were heading up here."

"Natasha?"

"She's in the basement kitchen. She saw you." His face tightened, "What is it? What's bothering you?"

"It's nothing." He replied quickly.

"Loki."

"A variety of things."

"Like?" He sighed.

"Mother." His answer seemed valid, but it clearly wasn't his biggest worry. However, he continued, "I have spent no time searching for a cure."

"But Eir said–"

"Eir has more important tasks. She has made no headway. I fear it has been too long."

"What do you mean?"

"Her body is still alive, that much is true, but I fear that her soul has wandered."

"Loki, we don't have any kind of proof for that."

"And in my mind, Thor's words keep repeating themselves. I know he said them out of anger, but I cannot help but wonder if they are true."

"What words?"

"That Mother was as good as dead as soon as she fell into that coma." I inhaled sharply, and winced at the discomfort it caused. Loki saw it instantly.

"You're in pain."

"He didn't mean it, and we don't know that for certain." I kept him at arm's length. I wasn't going to let him use my pain to bury his own. Loki just shook his head.

"I think I've known subconsciously for a long time now. I just haven't been able to admit it to myself."

"Well, when you talk like that, it's true. If we don't pursue the cure."

"If I pursue the cure, I will become obsessed with it, just like I was on our wedding night. She gave her last marrying us, she wouldn't want me to destroy it on her behalf."

"What do you need from me?" I lowered my arm, but he raised his in turn, maintaining the distance.

"Time. I need time to properly grieve. Spend some time with Wanda. And Natasha. Get to know Hope."

"I want to be here for you. I want to help you. You told me last night that you would be here for me, but I'm also here for you."

"No. Mira, you've helped me so much already. This is something I must do myself. Please." I took a step forward slowly, afraid that if I moved too fast he'd back away, but he allowed it. I took another, and then a third, close enough for my bump to press against his abdomen. I placed my hands on his shoulders, using them as leverage to pull myself up and kiss him.

"Ok. Take as much time as you need, but if you need anything, I will be here. I promise."