Making Her Numb (18+ ONLY)

MHN 5 || Maybe Never

 There was something about her that made him question his choices, even if he couldn't fully articulate why. Perhaps it was a glimmer of his buried humanity resurfacing amidst the chaos and darkness of his life.  

His sins may have stained his hands with the blood of the innocent, but that didn't absolve him of the responsibility to acknowledge his own remorse.

It was bittersweet to be the pride of his family, carrying the weight of their expectations. Yet, it came at the cost of restless nights plagued by self-loathing. A good night's sleep had become an elusive luxury for him. 

With a swift kick, Xylan closed the door behind him, striding purposefully towards the couch where Nadia had obediently settled herself. 

Her head hung low, silent tears streaming down her cheeks. The complexity of her emotions was evident, a powerful blend of courage and helplessness, intertwining and clashing within her.

Was there any end to the self-loathing that gnawed at Xylan's soul? He felt like a monster, a far cry from the man his mother had raised him to be. He had willingly chosen this life, and now he had to face the consequences, no matter how bitter they may be.

"Do you need some water?" Xylan whispered, his gaze intense as it locked onto Nadia's tear-streaked face.

"I just want to go home," Nadia responded her voice a mix of determination and desperation. At that moment, she radiated strength, despite the vulnerability etched in her every word. Her eyes, a mesmerizing shade of green, met Xylan's dull grey ones with an intensity that left him momentarily speechless.

Shaking off his stupor, Xylan resolved to be honest with her. After everything she had endured, she deserved nothing less than the truth.

"You know I can't let you go. It's safer for you to be with me. God knows what they would do to you if you were to go with them or be set free. If it weren't for me, you would have met a much darker fate. So, be grateful for what you have, because, in an instant, it could all be taken away," Xylan explained, his voice laced with a mix of caution and regret. 

He watched her carefully, allowing her the space to process his words, even though he couldn't fully comprehend his own motivations.

Nadia appeared conflicted, her mouth opening and closing as she struggled to find the right words. Xylan chose to remain silent, granting her the opportunity to navigate her own thoughts. Yet, despite the weight of the situation, his gaze couldn't help but wander to her lips, full and inviting, their faded pink hue accentuating the faint traces of swelling.

"How long will I be stuck here?" Nadia finally mustered the strength to ask, her eyes meeting Xylan's once again, the fire within her burning brighter.

"I honestly don't know. You were in a place you weren't supposed to be, and I don't think they have any intention of letting you go," Xylan replied, his voice tinged with regret as he recalled the depths of his own entanglements.

"How long?" Nadia persisted, her voice filled with newfound aggression that caught Xylan off guard. She clenched the collar of his t-shirt, her tiny hands jerking it for emphasis, her eyes ablaze with determination.

Xylan's smile faded, his posture stiffening as caution took hold. He had learned the hard way not to trust too easily, especially those he had deemed unworthy. She could easily turn against him at the first opportunity, rendering his attempts at salvation meaningless. Steadying himself, he gripped both of her wrists firmly, the strength of his hold unwavering.

A sharp cry escaped Nadia's lips as pain shot through her wrists. She struggled against his grip, but Xylan's grasp remained unyielding, like unyielding iron. The unexpected pain mingled with the electric tension between them, forming a charged atmosphere.

"Don't you dare use that tone with me, little girl. I'm doing you a favor. Always remember that. It's not every day I feel generous enough to save someone's life, especially someone like you. So, show some gratitude and watch that sharp tongue of yours while you're under my roof, or you might just find yourself on the receiving end of a spanking. Am I clear?" Xylan's voice rang out, firm and commanding, as he met Nadia's gaze, his eyes filled with a steely resolve.

Nadia trembled within his grasp, her vulnerability laid bare. She stammered her agreement, her voice laced with fear and submission. 

"Y-Yes," Nadia trembled, her vulnerability palpable. Xylan cursed under his breath as he felt the undeniable rise of arousal pressing against his groin. The dead had awakened at the worst possible moment.

Pushing her away with an urgency born of desperation, Xylan watched as Nadia stumbled back, surprise and hurt etching across her features. Without waiting for her questions, he turned abruptly and left the room, seeking a quick release from the overwhelming desire coursing through him.

"Will this ever end? Perhaps if I behave, if I promise not to tell anyone?" Nadia's words reached his ears just as he was about to take the final step away from the room, away from her gaze, away from the allure she unknowingly emanated.

As he moved away, ready to take his final step out of the room and away from her penetrating gaze and haunting voice, he stopped in his tracks. Turning slightly, he spoke a single word, aware of its weight and the inability for her to comprehend its intensity.

"Never."

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Ethan (FastAndDeep)