Ghost Bird | ✔

Twenty-Three

To stare into space and sigh.

"I want to scream and cry,

I am so miserable I want to die.

I wish I had someone to help me,

Someone to be there for me.

She hits me, starves me, and screams,

He leaves even though he is on my team.

"Let these words comfort me,

I don't have much else, really.

These words help me heal,

Even if they are not real.

They stop the tears,

There is no crying here.

"Darling, I see your pain, your tears,

Your cries don't fall on deaf ears.

Wipe your face and stand,

Here, give me your hand.

You're too strong to sit and cry,

To stare into space and sigh.

"No one says them to me,

But I can imagine it vividly.

The thought of a friend,

Someone is there till the end.

No one is there, besides this flood of red,

So I'll just say them in my head.

"Darling, I see your pain, your tears,

Your cries don't fall on deaf ears.

Wipe your face and stand,

Here, give me your hand.

You're too strong to sit and cry,

To stare into space and sigh."

"What is this song?" I shriek.

"It's Myself by Ghost Bird," Cleopatra answers quickly, alarmed. "Why?"

"I don't know who that is, but it's my song!" I shout.

Who is Ghost Bird?! That's my song! It's one of the songs that I gave Wil! I feel violated, really. That's my personal thoughts that are playing on the radio. And someone else is claiming that it is their song?!

"WHAT?!" Cleopatra screams, slamming on the breaks and staring at me with huge eyes.

"This is my song!" I yell. "Somebody stole it!"

"No one knows who Ghost Bird is..." Cleopatra murmurs staring at me. "Except maybe me now..."

"I don't know what or who you are talking about," I all but sob. "But that is my song."

"Prove it," Cleopatra demands, turning off the loud engine. "Sing it, right here, right now."

Scrunching my eyes closed, I do my best to ignore her intense glare. I take a deep breath in and begin.

The words pour out of me, a piece of my soul. They are ripped out of me as I force the words out, emotion evident in my voice. I can practically see the notes as they slide out of me, smooth and rich as yogurt.

As the final note is hanging in the air, lingering as if wanting to stay longer, I open my eyes and look at Cleopatra is staring at me with tears sliding down her smooth face.

"The recordings don't do you any justice," She murmurs, smearing her tears in an attempt to wipe her face clean. "You clearly are Ghost Bird."

***

Silas

This way of living, the checking over your shoulder for people watching, the trading cars every certain mile, reminds me all too much of Theo. Before my brother set fire to the church and accidentally killed my mother, he was paranoid, deeply so. Theo was certain that people were watching him, certain that there were people following him and out to get him.

I fight back the unease that raises inside of me as I smash the phone battery and throw the burner in the trash. Theo had an identical phone.

"This isn't like that," North tells me in Greek, reading my eyes.

Forcing a smile, I nod stiffly.

Maybe putting on a smile and faking it is pointless. Maybe it isn't. But my brothers are all having problems, all feeling troubled with this. We are meant for the Academy, and we certainly aren't meant to live like this. It is wrenching, knowing that we are doing what we shouldn't. It is different from rebelling, it is like smacking Mother Teresa in the face. Okay, that is exaggerating, the Academy certainly has its flaws, but it is the perfect place for flawed people like us.

I drag a hand over my face and speed up, catching up with the rest of my brothers easily.

Hold it together, Silas, I berate myself. Stop freaking out and just finish the assignment. Make sure that Ghost Bird is safe and get home.

But I now know that things will never be the same. We will no longer be able to go home and get back to our normal. So many things are changing with calculated moves.