the Rain

Look up

You are doing The right thing...

You'll be fine, believe me.

And that's why I'm here, not knowing where I am, only because I believe him and trust him.

Rafael is driving me to a place by the beach. I wasn't really sure about this hull therapy thing, but I had to do it at least for Rafael's sake.

The trip was quiet with only the radio filling the silence between us. I sneaked a look at Rafael's face and it looked the same only his black eyes. They were like two black holes, deep with no end.

I remembered the day I told him, we were in the warehouse by the docs and we got this new ship from Portugal. out of nowhere, the police were around us with guns pointed to our faces, all of our men took covers and started shouting but I stood in the middle of the place with my gun pointed towards the police. Maylo kept looking at me with horror waiting for one of the bullets to hit me and just die while Rafael kept yelling at me to retreat and take cover. It's not that I didn't hear them, it's because I didn't see why I should hide.
After we got out, with our ship, of course, Maylo came to me and slapped me so hard that I fell. Rafael knew it wasn't normal what I did, even them, the boys who lived their hull life in the middle of gunshots wouldn't do what I did. I knew I had to tell someone, so he asked and I answered. He wasn't shocked or scared or anything, he just nodded and walked away ...that's it. later he convinced Maylo to keep my work with them and it wasn't that easy but he eventually did and since then Rafael never gave me the time to breathe, the only way he knew how to help me was by explaining whatever I feel and not leave me alone.

I looked outside the window up to the sky, I noticed that there were too many colors. Then I held my chest, something felt weird inside me. A lot of questions stormed through my head and I wanted to ask Rafael but I decided not to.

A few minutes later he stopped, it was the end of the road. I looked around but there is no house or anything but the ocean on the other side.

"Why did you stop?" I asked looking into his eyes.

He smiled and pointed to a really small white house that was so far by the beach.

"Does it have to be that far?" I said pulling off my seatbelt.

"Yep!" he said brushing my hair "Have a good day sweetie"

"You're making it look like you're dropping me off at school" I said rolling my eyes.

"Then Consider it school and focus"

"OK, dad!" And I got out.

The place is really far I think I walked for a half-hour. when I got there it was... Just a normal slightly small white house with a white fence around it.

I took two steps on the front porch and the door got opened.

"Hello there!"

When I think of therapy, I instantly see an old person with an uncomfortable leather couch, but the person in front of me neither old and her couch isn't bad either.

"Please take a seat" she said smiling.

She was at least in her 20's and she was red-haired. I had a moment of doubt and it was confirmed when I heard what I think was an Asian song.

What was Rafael thinking? No, wait, what was I thinking by coming here? What? A young girl would talk to me about my situation and make me understand my emotions and how to control them by listening to Asian pop music???

"It Korean" she said sitting across from me "the song! It's from a Korean band, infinite"

I just nodded and kept debating myself on whether I should get out or just finish the day and never come back.