It All Started With a Diary

monster

I stood, and grabbed both of our plates. I washed them off, meanwhile leaving Ryland's untouched.

I kissed his cheek, feeling a bit of his prickly beard scratch at my face. "Heading out. Love you."

Without waiting for Ryland, I scurried out of the house. My legs picked up the pace once the memory from what happened yesterday hit me with the same impact the irregular wind did.

The bullying, the teasing, the Kade, my diary. Too much for one day, it seemed like. 

I decided it best to create my own pathway to school. One where no one would be able to harass or humiliate me.

I brushed dirt off the thigh area of my dark blue jeans. My oversized hoodie sagged over my body, concealing my curves and bumps.

"Here we go," I whispered as a self motivation speech.

It didn't work.

I stepped onto school ground, my hands sunk the holes of my hoodie. I twiddled with the soft material in a small form of comfort as I continued to feel stares, on top of the whispers. One rose above all of the others, though.

That feeling where someone is watching you. Everyone seemed to have it, even though others ignored it, I couldn't.

I glanced over my shoulder quick enough to catch eyes with Kade. I felt taken aback once I saw how his beautifully the midnight dark blue shirt hugged his body. He lifted a lit cigarette to his full lips, inhaling the smoke skillfully.

Smoking on school grounds. Shocking.

I swallowed the tight knot once I saw his eyes roam down my body. As naive as I was, I tried to believe that perhaps he would change today. Maybe he had a bad day yesterday. Though, I didn't consider that a good enough reason to place it on others.

Biting, chewing, and swallowing a huge lump of pride, my lips upturned in his direction. My smile was toothless, but it still was a smile nonetheless. It was trying to be considered a peace offering, but it was more of a 'quit acting like a fucking lunatic, and give me my diary back' smile.

His eyes widened slightly once he figured out I had smiled at him. He broke our locked eye connection, tilting his head to the ground. His eyebrows drew in close, mouth downturning into a frown. For a moment, it looked as if he were contemplating something.

Instead of returning to me, he continued to inhale the cigarette. His eyes never left the hard pavement underneath him. It was fascinating to watch the tick of his jaw harden under pressure by the passing second.

I frowned at his reaction. I tried to keep the acid from building in the bottom of my stomach at his hard judgment. It wasn't from fear of him, no.

It was fear of what he could do with my diary. My insecurities. My secrets.

My past.

Jerking back around, I hurried and walked into the school's main building. My heart began to ache at the thought of yet another day at this hell. I slowed down, watching my feet as I prepared myself.

"Are those big glasses of yours not working, or are you just blind?" a loud voice announced from behind me.

I turnt around to give the disembodied person a identity. His eyes looked as if they were created to resemble a dark river. They stared back at me with an unreasonable hatred in them. As he jerked his head to the side, the light reflected off of his golden hair. My eyes disappeared up the long arms that were littered in different tattoos.