Temper (Taboo Book 1)

17- Bruise

I sat up in shock as Elizabeth entered the room illuminated by the light of the moon. "Are you ready?" She asked. Her voice was almost kind. Her calm demeanor terrified me but the naive, sad child of my soul saw hope.
   
My body slipped from the bed to the floor as I tried to stand. She smiled down at me.

I was finally where she always claimed I deserved to be- beneath her. The expression was full of genuine benevolence. She was undoubtedly insane but maybe somewhere in her hateful body, she held compassion.

She laid the covered platter on the floor next to me and stepped back. She closed the door and leaned against it to watch. I tried not to gag at the scent as I lifted the lid. Even in my starvation, I couldn't find death appetizing.

I almost pushed the steak away. I almost chose my own death over the unnecessary sacrifice. She could see it. Her voice was soft as she prompted, "The animal is already dead. Go ahead. Eat this and I will let you leave to see your manservant. I have a car waiting right now."

A hand squeezed my heart. Home. I gulped as I lifted the knife and fork. I cut into the brown meat and tried not to focus on the sensation. I lifted the bite to my mouth and clamped my eyes closed.

Tears flooded my face and I chewed as little as possible. I dug the tip of the knife into my thigh to distract from the taste and reality. I swallowed and gulped the glass of water on the tray. My heart ached and screamed apologies to the carcass. I was betraying every kind, furry soul that had been a part of my life.

I looked to Elizabeth, begging her for it to be enough. "All of it." Her voice was no longer kind. Her eyes, hot with triumph, made me want to take the knife and plunge it into myself. I wanted to finish what she obviously desired to end- me. I wanted to yield to her wicked smile.

Home, I reminded myself. I looked at the meat and weighed it in my mind. My stomach felt as though it was bucking as I lifted another bite. Acid surged through my chest as I tried to swallow. I reached for the empty water glass as the two bites I attempted rushed back up into my throat. My body shivered and I begged for her to make it stop.

Her voice snapped at me, "Continue." I shook my head in answer. I couldn't even if I wanted to.

My back arched at the sharp sting crossing it. A shocked shriek clawed from my chest. I spun to see her lifting a thin leather belt above her head.

The sobs choked my screams, "Please. STOP!"

The lashes rained down harder and harder until it felt as though the heat in my back could make the sun shrink. "Continue," she sang as she danced back to the door. The bounce in her step was more frightening than the belt.

I covered my nose, desperate not to taste. I couldn't see through the tears as I lifted another bite. I swallowed and shoved in another. Three more bites were attempted before the need to vomit arose again.

My glass overflowed as I held it beneath my retching mouth. I stared down at my plate with dismay. It was almost gone but for the two bites splattered in the partially digested bits from my stomach. She saw my hesitation as defiance.

I gasped and tried to claw my way across the floor as the belt slashed down. Her words distorted my mind as she screamed how disgusting and revolting I was. I believed her.

The heavy buckle connected with my spine, heels, and skull. I fell to the floor, curled into a ball, and covered my head with my arms to protect myself as the buckle hammered against my fragile bones.

Her hand gripped my hair and dragged me across the floor back to the plate. Shock locked my throat and body. I couldn't rationalize enough to simply beg for release.

She pointed down at the plate, "Eat." I trembled in dehydration and fatigue. Every muscle screamed and my throat burned with invisible fire. I lifted the smaller of the two bites and tried to swallow it before I could taste the vomit.

"That's enough," she hissed with pleasure and disgust.

I was on my hands and knees retching on the floor. She watched me writhe in pain. My stomach hurt worse than before. I prayed for death. I cried for it, wept for it, but not even death loved me.

"You know," she began, swinging the belt back and forth in her hand. "We found a young man who was more than happy to help meet our need to find a suitable slice of flesh for you."

Her voice sang again as it pulled my mind closer to the world. I wasn't even disappointed. I couldn't find the strength to be upset that Hugh gave in. I cradled myself and tried to block her out.

Her words pulled my heart back into place with excruciating pain, "The young Beau. I remembered he was fond of hunting. His father is an old friend of mine. Didn't you know that's why they moved there? Beau procured this venison specifically for you." The evil grin spread across her face until it seemed her cheeks would crack. "He said you would be particularly 'fawned' of this sacrifice. He's quite charming."

I looked at the plate and the splattered vomit. My heart decimated as the realization sunk it. "No. You didn't."

She stepped closer to loom over me as my mind closed in. Time stopped as the betrayal began to maim through me. I wanted to succumb to its fangs and sink beneath the vile abyss.

Sobs ripped through my body as I dug through the mess, trying to find the pieces of meat. They looked like beef. She was lying.

I held the precious, distorted being in my hands that was torn apart at her will as grief rolled through me. The remainder of my sanity fell away. I knew no matter how I cried or how I tried to put the pieces of the mutilated being back together, I had failed them.

She bent to stare into my face, "Leave this house. I don't want our guests to see such an abomination at Christmas." She turned and walked from the room with a prideful swing in her hips. She turned and flashed a smile back to me, "Be back early January or the buck will fall next." She slammed the door closed behind herself as my world caved in.