Vitality

Chapter 12

I couldn't help returning the huge grin nearly splitting her face. "Me, too." We fell into silence. My thoughts kept straying to one in particular, so I just had to ask about him. "How's Kyle doing?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. Haven't seen him since you left, actually. You know we're not really friends. At least, not like you guys are."

I nodded, looking down. "I know, but I was kind of hoping you'd checked up on him for me. I'm not really looking forward to seeing him."

Her brow furrowed. "What do you mean? I though you guys were friends!"

"We are! It's just..." I trailed off, the memory of our last chat fresh in my mind. "I'd be lying if I said he wasn't one of my reasons for going with you."

Her jaw dropped. "But-"

"I don't want to see him."

She was quiet for a moment. "What happened?" she asked gently.

I sighed. "He was one of my reasons for staying behind, but then when I said I was considering going with you, he kind of ... deflated. I felt so bad about hurting him. After everything between us, he really needs his space. If I'm not there, things will get better sooner. I don't want to lose him."

Fiona studied me for a long moment. "Liz, are you sure you don't have feelings for him? What you're saying, how you're acting - it really seems like you do. "

I froze. "I don't!" I practically shouted. "Fi, I only like him as a friend - I always have. Nothing has changed. I care for you just as much."

She raised an eyebrow at me. "You do care a lot about your friends, but I think there's something a little more than that motivating you here. All I ask is that you think about it. Okay?"

I frowned and tried to not scowl at her. "Fine," I said, having no intentions of doing so. "You need to get to work, and I need to figure out what I'm going to do today."

She sighed but smiled at me. "Okay. I'll talk to you later!" She gave me a final cheery wave and her video feed cut.

I took a deep breath and held it for a moment before releasing it. All that was left for me to think through was Shawn's offer. It wasn't something to take lightly, and I had no intention of doing so.

---

My heart feels like it's trying to beat out of my chest as I raise my hand. It's barely eight in the morning, but I know Shawn's up - I could clearly hear him when he came back upstairs. Still, I'm nervous as I lightly knock.

"Come in," he says. I take a deep breath as I open the door and step inside the dark room. He swivels his chair to face me. "Hey," he says with a tired smile. Upon a closer look I can see bags under his eyes, suggesting he pulled an all-nighter.

I sit on the corner of his bed closest to him. "I wanted to talk to you."

"About yesterday, I hope."

"Yes."

"Have you made a decision?"

I take another deep breath, this time expelling it with a rush of words that somehow manage to sound normal. "Before I make a decision, I want to ask you a few questions."

"Ask away."

I hesitate a moment before saying, "I remember you said you thought you were in danger. Is that true?"

He shifts in his seat slightly and shifts his gaze away before snapping it back. "Um," is all he says.

"We both know you lied," I say calmly, hoping I'm reading him right.

He stiffens and studies me for a long moment. I resist the urge to squirm under his gaze, instead trying to appear like I know what I'm talking about. Finally, he seems to deflate. "You're right." He sighs and runs a hand over his hair. "Can you blame me, though? I only wanted you to help and that was one way I knew I could convince you." He begins to gnaw on his lip.

"What else aren't you telling me? Is there something I should know?" He nods, but says nothing. "Is it something big?" He shrugs. "If it's nothing, just tell me."

He let out a breath and releases his lip. "There have been a couple of programmers I know go missing, but it's nothing major. These guys are terrible at keeping their identity hidden, so they drop off the grid sometimes and resurface a couple or so months later. I'm just a little worried about them because they haven't surfaced in nearly four months. One Trina knows hasn't been around for six. She was supposed to team up with Trina to build some app, so she's concerned. Other than that, I don't honestly think I'm in any immediate danger."

So some of them had gone missing. I should have at least considered that as a possibility since I already knew every convincing lie was based on truth. "So what you're telling me," I say slowly, "is that you lied to me."

"Not exactly," he says quietly.

"You tried to make me believe something untrue, so, yes, you lied to me."

He stares at me and I can tell he's a little lost for words. After a few moments, his shoulders slump forward and he sighs. "Fine. I did, and I'm not exactly sorry. You're here, aren't you?"

I set my jaw and sit up straighter. "Shawn, a lie is a lie. If you lied to me once, how do I know you won't do it again? How do I know you're not going to just turn me in yourself if I say yes? Just get me to help you out then hand me over to the police on a silver platter when you're done?"

His complexion was dark, and the room wasn't well lit by any means, but I could have sworn I saw him pale. "Liz, I'd never-"

I hold up my hand and he stops talking. "I don't honestly think you will, but you see what I mean?" He swallows hard but nods, looking relieved. I rest my hands on top of my crossed legs and contemplate the wording of my next sentence. "Is there anything else you're not telling me that I probably ought to know?"

Our eyes met and I could see something spark there but it was gone before I could really tell what it was. "No."

I study him a moment longer before nodding. "Okay." We sit in silence for a long moment.

What I'd realized at some point last night was that life is full of risks. Sometimes they fail and we get stuck with fixing all of our mistakes, while other times they pay off. Everything comes with a measure of risk. Me coming here, for instance. I could have been unknowingly stepping into the house of a serial killer who would murder and then dump me off somewhere. Fortunately, I was just in the home of a cereal killer who seemed to eat an entire box of Cookie Crisp for breakfast.

I'd also somehow convinced myself that this wasn't a horrible idea. I read up on the most recent laws and found Texas' recent laws on hacking commercial networks was punishable by either a $2000 fine or up to six months in jail or a combination. That being my basis, I'd somehow also convinced myself I had a good answer to Shawn's proposal.

"Shawn, remember what you said yesterday? About everything I would need to do and I said I would think about it?" I ask. He nods, waiting. "Well, I have an answer for you."

He waits, presumably waiting for me. I kind of want to change my mind before I commit, but it's the right thing - I can feel it in my bones. This doesn't just affect me - the outcome could affect billions of people worldwide. "What have you decided?" He bites down on his lip.

I take a deep breath and momentarily close my eyes, resigning myself. "I'm in."