The Middle

Chapter 6 - Meaning of Stop

Becca shoves her phone in her pocket and runs down to the pool with everyone else.

"Becca what did you do?!" I call down

As I walk outside everyone starts screaming. Becca looks over at me with an evil grin plastered across her face. I feel my face drop in panic as I look over and see John looking as confused as I feel. All the girls quickly run out of the pool and cover themselves with towels, covering up their bare exposed skin.

"Why did I spend one drop of my time with your gay ass?!" I hear one of John's Ex's call out.

With that I watch everyone begin to leave, pulling away in their cars. Becca looks at me, laughs, then runs to her car and leaves. The only one still here is John.

"What the fuck Becca?! You said it was an emergency!" John calls out

"It was! Thank you!" Becca says as she steps on the gas hard leaving with the rev of her engine. I sit down on the metal table and wrap myself with a towel covering my almost naked appearance. I pull the red and yellow towel over my face pretending to dry my eyes. What do I even say to this? I'm going to KILL Becca I thought to myself. I didn't move or say anything. He didn't deserve an explanation from me, Becca, Gabi or anyone. I peer out of the corner of my towel and see John walk around the pool and up to me. His face looks hurt and full of rage.

"Is this what you wanted?! He screams out.
"You were just so g-d damn desperate for me weren't you Kenna?!

He moved his face closer to mine. I try to speak but I can't figure out what to say. I look up at him full of guilt.

"I'm not even gay! I was drunk! Hell I still am drunk! But you couldn't keep it to yourself because you want me and bad." He says moving his face and body closer to mine.

"Not really..." I wince out from behind my towel. I really have good timing with my sass. I think to myself.

"Oh but you do. That's why you did it right? Fucked up my life, made me lose my new girl. That's why you did it right?!" He says angrily as he gets even closer.

"Can you please hand me my phone and leave?" I say with a bit more confidence. I watch as he picks up my phone up off the chair in front of me. I reach out to grab it but instead of grabbing my phone John quickly moved his pelvis forward and I grab his crotch. I feel a soft fleshiness that stuns me. In panic I pull my hand away and don't know what to do next. I can't believe I just did that. I'm such a fuckin idiot!

"Oh my gosh I'm so sorry" I say and feel my face begin to burn a fire red.

"No your not! That's all you have wanted from me from the start! Are you happy now!? Crazy bitch!" He screams at me spitting into my face. I wipe away the droplets with my towel and don't move. He actually meant for me to do that! I think to myself still in panic. Before I can think anymore John reaches out and violently grabs my breast. His hand pushed away my towel and I feel him slide under my bra.

"What the fuck! Stop!! STOP!" I scream out desperate for someone to hear me but I know that there is no one around. In that moment I wondered if I mattered enough to someone that they would favor me and stop him, or if I really just deserved this. I feel his grip tighten. I swat his hand away and he releases his grip along with a low chuckle. My heart begins to race out of control in my chest. I feel my boob throb with every pound.

"Calm your tits Kenna! He calls out.
"Oh right, if you actually had any! You and your scrawny ass." He says sternly leaning into my ear. I grab my towel and begin to pull it back around me as if it would protect anything. With my towel only half around me John hits me with an open palm across the chest sending pain streaming through my nerves. My jaw drops in shock. I feel my body begin to violently shake. I watch as he turns his head and walks his way down the stone path and into his car. As he pulls out of my driveway I can feel him drag both my dignity and my sanity as if it was attached to a rope on the back of his black pick-up. For so long I had imagined his touch but now all I wanted was to forget it. I rolled myself in my towel and laid down on the cool dark table top looking out into the woods. I start to try to make myself cry but nothing. I feel nothing. Numb except for the ache of the bruise left over along my chest. I looked up at the sky that was beginning to cover with dark misty clouds. The stars were giving me nothing to wish on. I hear a crack of thunder go off somewhere in the distance causing the crickets chirping and the frogs peeping to go silent. With the earth silent I begin to hear, I begin to feel, I begin to see the screams of women around the world. I can't imagine if he hadn't stopped. He clearly didn't care about me asking him to stop. I thought as more and more race through my mind.

When you are little, girls are warned about monsters under their beds. As girls grow up we learn that g-d turn our monsters into men.

With that I feel my thoughts be carried away by a reassuring stormy breeze as I feel my eyes grow heavy. I stop fighting and close them allowing myself to drift asleep. As I do I feel the world move slow around me pretending as if school Monday would never come but, even g-d knows that Monday would come.