Eclipse Child |✔|

|28|

I realize then that he is asleep. Gently I shake him, knowing this could not wait.

"Urgh, what?"

"Schulman, it's me."

The old male groans, "I should have known."

I sit across from him, waiting.

Slowly he turns his chair, bones creaking at the movement.

"What do you want? Is this an emergency?"

I shrug, "A little..." I pause, not knowing how to convey what I need.

"Schulman...I....I need something...a um...herb from you for..."

The old wolf raises his hand, "Say no more."

He points to a cabinet, "I prepared it the moment you came back with him."

My heart beat increases as I rise and do as told. I see it immediately. A small tin with words inscribed on a label that read, 'Soraya only. Keep your paws off.'

With shaking hands, I open it to see the herb I need inside.

The room is silent as I stare at the mixture. Schulman clears his throat, his tone softer, "The mate bond is strong Soraya. You don't have to beat yourself up for giving into it."

My free hand curls into a fist from his words.

"I know that," it's hard to sound neutral against my gritted teeth.

Schulman sighs, "why don't you boil some water? It will taste better that way."

I continue to stand though, the question fighting in my mouth until I turn to him, "so you knew I was this weak? You knew I would...that I couldn't... from the start..."

My words come out flat, my emotions held back. Schulman is already shaking his head slowly, "no, no, no, that's not it at all Soraya. How many times do I have to remind you that this is not a weakness? Your list- that list you keep in your head of things that are weak are not true."

"But you knew-,"

"Of course I didn't know!" Schulman coughs, his raised voice grating against his throat, I wait for him to catch his breath as he shakily whispers, "I don't know the future. All I know is that there could be a possibility, and now you need it. Why do you have to twist everything that's good?"

His words stop me short.

I look down at the herbs, knowing I needed them, yet at the same time, feeling a guilt like no other clawing against my chest.

"It's your choice to take it."

"I know that. It's always my choice." 

We don't say another word, as I boil the water, mixing the herbs inside and letting them seep. Sighing I sit across from Schulman. The first sip of the liquid makes my face pull back, the bitterness sliding against my tongue.

Schulman is leaned back in his chair. His body sags against the back, his whole face a mass of wrinkles and loose skin.

"Schulman...how old are you?"

He laughs at the blunt question. It occurs to me then how much of Orion has rubbed off me.

"I lost count."

I choke on the bile liquid, wheezing it back down to regain my breath.

He shakes his head, a tired motion as I raise an eyebrow in surprise to his answer.

"I honestly don't know why I haven't been killed off yet."

I blanch at his statement, "Schulman, why the goddess would you say that?"