Bad Boy (Jin x BTS)

~1~

Jin looked out of his window at the rain. He was curled up on his chair with a hot cup of tea cradled in his hands. It had been a month and two days since he had gotten back home. It had been six months and two days since he had felt alive. The rain pounded against the glass of the window, taking Jin from his thoughts as he watched the rain plummet in a blur of motion. He could barely make out the lights of the street below through the downpour but he still tried. He swore if he squinted hard enough he could almost see the outline of a person looking up towards his window. He leaned forward in his chair to try and get a better glance but when he moved, so did the black figure looking shape. It disappeared as quickly as the steam rising from Jin's cup of tea.

"Would you stop that?"

Jin turned back to see his friend and roommate, Jiho, standing in the kitchen doorway. His arms were braced against the doorway and he was looking at Jin with that look again. Jin hated that look. It was a mixture of pity and looking at him as if he was crazy. Jiho had moved in with him after he had gotten back home and he had mentioned a few times he no longer felt safe alone. Jin always felt watched as of late and even he was starting to wonder if he was crazy. Jiho had moved in, though. He had happily done it, saying he just wanted Jin to get back to normal and feel better. For around the first week, Jin had felt much better. But then he started to fall into something like depression. He couldn't put his finger on it but it was almost as if he missed being with the gang members. It was almost as if he wanted to see them again. It had been so frightening and exciting and throughout everything it had rushed Jin's blood. He had dealt with it poorly at the time but he wanted, in a way, to try it all over again.

"Stop what?" he finally took a sip of his tea. It was too hot and scalded his tongue but Jin didn't bother to even react. Everything felt like it took too much effort nowadays.

The room they were in was dimly lit. Jin hadn't bothered to turn a light on once he got home from work that day. It felt chilly in there, agreeing with the grey and snappy chill of the stormy weather outside. Jin had moved his chair to the window awhile after coming back home from the gang members' hideout. It used to sit beside the couch but Jin didn't want it there anymore. There was a couch a few feet away, pushed against the wall and facing their TV set that was mounted on the wall. It wasn't a terribly large screen but it was big enough. Jin used to watch shows on it all the time and have movie night parties at his house all the time. There was also a nice coffee table Jin had stumbled across one day. He had bought it immediately, admiring the darkness of the wood.

Despite the color of their living room, everything was as grey as it was outside. Their living room was carpeted with a maroon colored carpet – it only spanned around half of the living room and clashed rather nicely with the light of the hardwood floor.

"Staring out of that damn window. There's nothing out there, Jin." Jiho snapped.

Jiho tried to help Jin. He really did. He loved Jin like a brother and would always watch out for him but there were some things Jin started doing that he had never done before. He always looked and watched now. He watched everything around him. But he never moved. He would stay still and watch and wait but Jiho didn't know what he was waiting for. Jin wouldn't go out with their friend group anymore. He wanted to stay at home and look out of the window at the city lights. It was becoming less worrisome and more annoying.

Jin started taking different routes home. Instead of taking the main street, he would go a back way or if he was walking he would pick a shortcut through an alleyway. If he had to go to a bank, he always went to the same bank he had been kidnapped from. Jiho would have thought Jin would have avoided the place like the plague but if anything it was as if his friend was drawn there. Jin spent less time on his phone and more time watching the people in the park.

He was looking for something, whether he knew it or not, but it was a mystery to Jiho and Jin himself as to what.

"I'm sorry it bothers you," Jin didn't snap back. He was calm. That was another thing that Jiho found unnerving. He was barely able to even faze Jin anymore. The other man took everything in stride with an almost blank expression, nodding and agreeing or disagreeing and making a fair and calm reply. If Jin had been like that before the kidnapping, Jiho might have liked it but since this was Jin's way after the kidnapping, it only reinforced what Jiho had been thinking.

Jin needed help. Those bastards had mentally screwed with his friend and Jin needed to get help.

Jiho had tried to force Jin to go to a phycologist before. Jin had been against it but Jiho still had gotten him to go through begging, pleading and promising a nice, free meal out afterwards. Jiho was happy to see that out of all the things that had changed, Jin's appetite and love for food had not.

Jiho had waited outside of the room Jin and the phycologist were in. When Jin got out, he seemed tired but he still wanted his free food. Jiho had been able to get Jin to agree to set up weekly appointments with the phycologist but he had no clue if Jin actually went to the appointments or not. They both had work after all and Jiho couldn't keep up with everything in Jin's life. He tried, though. He tried as best as he could.

Jiho had also tried to get Jin to talk to him about what had happened. The first few times had ended with Jin in tears or yelling for Jiho to leave him alone and get out. It was the only thing that seemed to really upset him after he had returned home. Jin refused to talk about it. He didn't give names of the gang members, he wouldn't work with the police and he most certainly never mentioned anything that happened to him. He just stayed to himself, looking out his window with a blank expression on his face and a dull look in his eyes.

"Why don't we go somewhere today?" Jiho asked. He was hoping against hope Jin would agree. It would do him good to get out of the house and stop being a recluse.

"It's raining." Jin sipped his tea again, happy that it was finally cool enough to not burn his tongue but also warm enough that he could feel it run down his throat and spread the warmth to the rest of his body.

"So what?" Jiho shrugged, making his way over to see on the floor in front of Jin. It was cold on the floor but he didn't really care.

Jin didn't even spare him a glance. He kept his eyes focused on the rain and what lay beyond his window, "I don't want to go out in the rain."

"You don't want to go out in the sunshine, either. What's the difference?" Jiho argued.

Jin sighed deeply, looking at the dark brown color of his tea, "Will it make you feel better if I did?"

"I want it to make you feel better." He paused, "I just wish you'd be more like you were before all that shit went down with the bank being robbed and you being kidnapped."

Jin stirred at that, finally letting his wandering eyes leave the rain and the world outside his window to give his friend his full attention. He couldn't say anything, though. Jiho would say he was insane. He wouldn't understand. No one could understand...

"Have I changed?" he asked, tilting his head and faking innocence. He knew he had changed. He knew it was starting to weigh on Jiho. But he couldn't change back. Not until he found the gang again and got some sort of closure. They had left far too quickly.

"Don't play that, Jin. We both know you have." Jiho retorted, irritation flaming in his dark eyes.

Jin let his eyes go back to his tea, "Fine. I'll go out with you."

Jiho clapped in excitement, his irritation leaving. Perhaps he was making strides with Jin, finally, "Where do you want to go?"

Jin let his eyes settle back on the world outside, "Wherever you want."

He heard Jiho grumbling about his lack of attention before Jiho replied, "Fine. We're going to the club tonight."

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