Song: I Fall In Love Too Easily by Chet Baker
My obsession of boys started out young. First grade to be exact. Parley Munez and I got along so well that the Disney romance obsessed part of me thought it was meant to be. During recess we would pretend that we were Pokemon masters; with his caramel skin and black bowl cut we agreed he was Brock, and I, being a pasty girl with honey colored hair, was obviously Misty. We'd spend our beloved half hour break travelling through the jungle gym as if were a jungle, using the swings to fly from island to island. Or we'd create our own episodes to Star Wars. Of course, he was always the damsel in distress and I had come to rescue him.
Sometimes I'd get caught by Darth Vader himself during the rescue missions, and Parley and I would have to figure out how to escape together. Hand in hand, we'd nyoooooommmmm and fwahhh our way out of the Death Star and back into the safe ground of the swing set. The swing set was always base.
Eventually, the school year came to an end and the seemingly never ending dog days of summer rolled in. I said goodbye to Parley and his friends in exchange for a few months of exploration around my house.
The night before second grade began, I maturely packed my bag with all things a proper second grader would need. Gel pens, hair bands, Chapstick, and a journal that contained top secret information. To my horror, my mom would end up unpacking my bag and revealing said information to our neighbourhood. I wouldn't've found out until years later if I hadn't come out to see them reading it and laughing. I heard them read it outloud.
"Hello Ivy... Its me agin. Oh right, you don't know me. Well you do, beecuz I'm the only one who writs in hear. If you were oneduring its Gisele. I have a sercret that I cant not keep anymor. I cant help it... Yes, it's true. I am in love with Parley Munez."
And my anger in seeing them reading it, although justified, did not scare them. Instead, I looked like a baby chihuahua. I had fierce intentions, but I just caused more endearment to be placed. Thus, I was left with the silent embarrassment of having your most private thoughts shared and a broken ego.
I returned to school hoping to have a serious Disney discussion with Parley, but we had become distant over summer. I still loved Pokemon and Star Wars, but I wanted us to add romance. He, being a seven year old, strongly objected. We remained friends, but I found other people to put my affections on.
Like his best friend Will.
Will and I got along. Really well. We even could talk about, dare I say it... love. His aunt's was just down the street from me, and he was going to her house after school so then both of his parents could work without hiring a babysitter. We would ride the bus together and have deep discussions about Pokemon, Star Wars, and Mario. Specifically, the romance involved in all of them.
I tried my hand at this "flirting" I caught some middle schoolers talking about when I noticed that he kept licking his lips. Needless to say, it did not end well. But we did end up having a very in depth conversation about licking one's lips instead of using Chapstick to get them to not be chapped (I blame my mom for taking the Chapstick out the night she found my diary). He also had a page dedicated to him in my Barbie diary.
Fast forward another school year to the summer I met Daniel. He was the cool kid a year older than me, but he put up with my crush-induced shenanigans. My brother, him, and I would play spies or Star Wars or whatever on our bikes and across the neighborhood. Sometimes the neighbors would join in and that's when we would vanquish the final boss. We would save defeating it until we had backup. Everything would have to be completed before he left at the end of summer.
That friendship was quickly ruined three summers down the road once one of my neighbors realised I liked him, and told her brother who was his age. I was in the garage, getting popsicles out of the freezer when "You Belong With Me" by the one and only T-Swizzle came on, when my jam sesh was interrupted by the brother jesting at me because I obviously wanted a certain someone *cough* Daniel *cough* not really I'm awkward *cough* to hear it. Speak of the devil and he will appear, speak of a crush and they will hear.
He remained friends with my brother but promptly ignored me for the rest of that summer, and the years following.
Would there ever be an end to the obsession?
Nah. But it did pause when I met my first manwhore.
His name was Gregory. What a weasel. He tried to weasel his way into every girl's heart with his angelic soprano voice, preppy books with a faux bad boy look (aka the J Biebs haircut. The tweenage pop heartthrob, who my best friend Rhea would later say she would like to meet so then she could smash a brick on his face, wouldn't appear as a person to remotely care about for another year). Gregory had a new girlfriend every week. Sometimes every period. He cycled through every single girl he deemed as being attractive enough to be worth his precious time, until he had his eyes on my other best friend, Charlotte.
Charlotte didn't want to date until she was in high school, and had so kindly expressed her willingness for friendship but not for a relationship, especially a measly one from the Duke of Weaseltown, aka Gregory. But since he couldn't take no as an answer for his drink of the day, he began to pursue.
The awkward hopeless romantic in me would have swooned if his version of pursuing wasn't chasing her down the hallway screaming "BE MY GIRLFRIEND". But it was. So the awkward hopeless romantic donned the robe of fierce mama chicken and halted him in his tracks before any damage could be done. Little did I know that this would cause him to hate me and declare me as his secret sworn enemy for six years (lol).
So... what exactly did I do? I told him to "please stop". He could remain friends with us, but nothing more. And he was creeping us out.
There are two things you should never underestimate:
1) What an awkward introvert will do to help their friend.
2) The pettiness of a twelve year old.
After the Gregory incident, I swore off boys. Sadly enough, my obsession abstinence only lasted for two school years.
~~~~~
After being away for two years, I'm back and ready to attack (lol not really I haven't written anything in two years please spare me). Thank you for reading!
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