Her Lost Identity

Her Lost Identity [27] ~ Party Pooper

“Hey,” he replied almost straight away. He sounded as if he’d been crying. “I was just about to call...”

“Are you okay?” I asked him, a frown forming on my face. “You don’t sound okay.” I didn’t even give him the time to respond.

I heard a sigh, and then he said, “No, I’m okay.”

Liar, I thought.

“I’m not okay, either,” I admitted, honestly. “Ever since I got on that plane, I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

And it was true. I couldn’t. Even though I hadn’t lost touch with Nathan, it felt exactly like last time.

“I know it may sound stupid, but I feel exactly like I did when I found out you’d left,” he stuttered. I internally giggled, thinking about how I was thinking the exact same thing.

We talked about some other random things such as how Jake and Jess had seemed to be coping better than us.

“You should get back to writing books,” Nathan told me, out of the blue. “You know, like you used to.”

“About what?” I asked, confused. Sure, I liked writing before. I guess I just didn’t have the time anymore. Plus, what would I write about?

“You’ll figure it out,” he assured me. I could hear the smile in his voice, and it instantly made me smile.

“There’s a surprise party downstairs for me,” I informed him. “I guess I’m not really feeling it though.”

He told me that I should go and have fun, and then if I wanted to, call him again later. Even though I told him that I would and said goodbye, all I wanted was to speak to him. For some reason, not only did being away from Ohio make me feel away from Nathan, but my mum too.

I played with the heart chains around my neck, and sobbed quietly to myself. I bawled for what seemed like hours, me barely being able to even breathe.

As I heard the door creak open, I hastily wiped my tears with my hands. I dared not to look up to see who it was, for I probably looked all red-eyed, and as if I had in fact been crying.

I felt my bed dip down as someone had sat on it, and then felt someone’s large hand circling my back. Only then, I knew who it was.

“Hi, Jack,” I greeted him between sobs, not meeting his eyes. I knew it was him because I remembered how he’d do this when I first moved in. This went on for months.

“Hey, kiddo,” he sighed, still rubbing my back with his big hands. “Been looking for you.”

“You found me,” I tried to joke, only was too upset to actually make a laugh out of it.

Laughing lightly, he said, “I did.”

I sat up and stared at Jack for a moment. Sometimes I would forget how genuinely nice and caring he actually was.

“What’s wrong, honey?” he asked, looking me in the eye.

I poured my heart out, telling him about everything and how I felt about everything. “Don’t get me wrong, Jack, I love you guys, I love it here, and I have missed you... I just don’t think I was quite finished.”

“Cass,” he began. “Sometimes in life, you don’t get to do everything you wanted to when you want. Things do in fact move fast. It feels like it was only yesterday you moved in with us, a quiet, short, black haired girl that came with none other than the clothes she was wearing. There was a lot of stuff I wish I had done with you when you were that age, I just didn’t get the chance. But that doesn’t mean I can’t make up for it.”