Foolish Sparks

Chapter 9: Help

I bit my lips, in attempt to control my flustered cheeks pero alam kong walang patama iyon. I tried to sound sultry pero alam kong babaeng-babae ang boses ko. Much probably like the voice I used last night when I screamed and moaned his name over and over again.

His eyes widened in surprise and confusion.

"What do you mean by that, Ryn?" tanong niya.

Lumunok ako. With all my strength, I looked at him straight in the eyes.

"You heard it right, Eros. I'm in love with you." I said the last words as a whisper, as if it's a secret not meant to be heard by anyone else.

When I said it while looking deep into his eyes looking back at me, bigla kong naalala ang mga unang pagkakataon when I just realized that I caught feelings for him. I can't pinpoint when exactly did I feel it pero naramdaman ko lang bigla.

During our first project, I was already pretty close to him. He was pretty friendly at dahil expressive ang mga mata niya, hindi na ako nahihirapan mag-kunwaring kilig sa mga eksena namin. However, everything changed during our second project na teleserye. A teleserye is tougher than a movie because it could get extended and dragged for a long time.

Unlike our first project where we had breaks pa naman, sa teleserye, araw-araw talaga ang taping. I was with him everyday and it's not like I didn't like it. My first sign was when I brought him a pillow.

Nakita ko kasi na nahihirapan siya matulog tuwing nagta-taping kami at ewan ko, tuwing nakikita ko siyang ganoon, kumikirot yung puso ko. I ordered a pillow for him to use at ever since, ito na ang ginagamit niyang pillow kapag nagta-taping kami. I have never done that or cared that much for any of my leading men.

Dahil naman sa ginawa kong 'yun, nalaman ng ibang showbiz insiders at nag-spark din ng rumors na baka there was something going on between us. We would always keep them guessing, dahil na din sa utos ng management.

I knew it wasn't a simple crush when I get extra shy every time he's around. I blush for no reason at kapag gumawa kami ng scene, every time he touches me, parang napapaso ako. I felt shy around him for no reason. Natutulala din ako kapag umeeksena na kami. One instance where I've definitely had it hard is sa first teleserye din namin. He kissed me and I wasn't supposed to kiss back pero I kissed him back widly.

"Cut!" tawag ni Direk.

I pulled away from Eros, catching my breath. Ganoon din siya.

"C'mon, lovebirds. Ryn, wag ka naman padala. Eksena 'to, you're not supposed to kiss him back, ha?" biro ng direktor namin.

I couldn't even look at him straight after that. Madalian kong tinapos ang scene na 'yun ang nag-kulong muna sa dressing room para ma-organize ko ang thoughts ko.

This small crush... I've always thought na I only feel something different for him because nadadala ako sa mga scenes. I was so into my character kaya na-coconfuse ko na din ang feelings ng character ko sa feelings ko sakanya.

But, nope!

That isn't it. Kanina, hindi na ako umaarte. Heck, for the past few days, I wasn't even acting! I was acting naturally dahil sa totoong buhay... in love na din ako sakanya.

It's not hard to fall for him. He was always nice to me, a gentleman at the very best. Very professional siyang katrabaho at masayang kakwentuhan. He doesn't mind listening to my rambles, what I like and my future goals sa industriya. He actually seemed very interested in them. Kapag nag-uusap kami, palaging may substance.

Dahil sweet na sweet siya sa akin sa trabaho, I even thought he had the same feelings as well. Fuck you, Aeryn!

He's perfect. Only if he wasn't in love with someone else.