I Dare You

two

MY BATH WATER GOT cold about an hour ago, but I can't seem to find the strength or the will to get up. Several people have come and knocked on my bathroom door, but I never answer. I just sit and prune.

I don't know how long exactly I've been in the tub before a soft knocking comes to my door. This knock is different from the others, it's familiar and filled with longing. I finally stand from the freezing cold water, drain the tub, and wrap a towel around my body. I open the door and walk past Pete into my bedroom. I go straight for the closet, shutting the door slightly so that I have privacy to change without completely shutting him out. He needs me.

"Have you seen father?" Pete asks me quietly? "I haven't seen him since earlier, you know."

"I suppose he's busy. He's a very busy man." I shrug and my wet dark hair bounces on my shoulders. I walk past Pete again, unable to look him in the eyes. I go over to my desk and shuffle some papers around, opening and closing random books.

"I miss her." He whispers.

Those three words stop me in my tracks. I have never felt so vulnerable by three words before. Three words have never made me so angry and sad at the same time. I turn around almost instantly and wrap my arms around my little brother. This isn't fair, to him, to me.

"Me too." I whisper. I feel him start to cry in my arms and I want to cry too, but nothing comes out. "How about I tuck you in tonight?"

He lets go of me and wipes at his runny nose and puffy pink eyes. He nods.

I walk him down the hall to his room and turn on all of the lights. Pete climbs into bed as I make sure that all of the windows are shut, he has a glass of water, his nightlight is plugged in, and that there are no monsters in his closet or under the bed.

"Just in case." He says. "Not because I'm scared, but just in case."

"Of course." I nod as I tuck him in just the way mom does. "There."

"What happens now?" Pete whispers as he clutches the stuffed bear that mom got him for his last birthday.

"Now I'm going to turn the lights off and you're going to go to sleep."

"That's not what I mean." He shakes his head.

"I don't know." I whisper. I lean across the side of his race car bed and kiss his forehead before turning off the lights and leaving the door open a crack in case he needs me in the middle of the night.

I decide to walk downstairs and see if I can find father. I hear yelling coming from the direction of his office. We aren't supposed to be up this late, or anywhere near his office because 'this is a place of work and business not for children'. I honestly had never been inside.

"For the last time, NO. It has to be poinsettias and not roses." Those words sound funny coming from my fathers mouth. I have never heard him say anything about flowers, ever. "She would have wanted poinsettias."

The last bit sounded sad. I peeked through the crack in the door to see my father sitting at his desk, Uncle Leo pacing off to the side, sniffling into a tissue, and Gregory Porter, my fathers Beta, sitting casually on the couch with a cigar in hand.

"I just can't believe that this is what we're doing right now." Uncle Leo whispered.

"What do you want me to be doing Leopold?" My father seems frazzled and unlike himself in that moment, but it only lasts a second before his hard impenetrable exterior is back.

"Have you even spoken to the children?" Uncle Leo asks. "I can't even imagine what they must be feeling."

"They can take care of themselves. Cleo has it under control." My father brushes the topic off, as if it's no big deal. Just as he always brushes Peter and I off.

"She's only ten Harry." Uncle Leo half shouts- half whispers. "They just lost their mother and instead of being with your children you're down here going on about fucking flowers!"

"If you're so worried about them, why don't you go check on the little brats?" I did not appreciate being called a brat, especially by such a rude and impossible meanie. He took another puff of his cigar and choked a little. Bless the Moon Goddess for punishing him.

"I don't need to be checked on." I say as I push open the door. "And I am not a brat."

"Cleo, what are you doing in here sweetie?" Uncle Leo rushes to my side, resting a hand on my back.

"Go. You know you're not supposed to be in here. Get out." The cold tone of his voice isn't shocking or new to me.

"No." I place my hands on my hips and stare him down.

"Excuse me?" He uses his Alpha voice and my hands immediately lower, to rest at my sides.

"I don't care that you don't care about me. I don't need you to. But Pete does. He needs his father right now. He needs to know what's going on and what's going to happen. I can only do so much."

I yelled at my father. I have never yelled at anyone. And by the look on my fathers face he was not expecting that from me. His eyes have darkened and his typical stoic expression is replaced with a clenched jaw and tightened fists. Gregory holds an expression of pure enjoyment, as if I am somehow entertaining him.

"Cleo." My Uncle Leo scolds. "You cannot talk to him like that. He is the Alpha."

"Alpha this, Alpha that. It's always about him being an Alpha." I roll my eyes. "Be a father for once."

And with that I storm out of his office and up the stairs to my room. I slam the door and climb into bed, falling asleep rather quickly.

•••

"Cleo." Pete shakes me again. "Cleo. Something's happened."

I open my eyes and sit up immediately, bumping heads with Pete. "Why are you so close to me?"

"Come on. Something's happened." I rub at my forehead and chase after him down the stairs. He runs all the way to fathers office and he's right, something has happened.

A bunch of people, some I've never seen before, surround the door and are speaking very loudly. They are all talking so loud and so fast all at once it's very hard to eavesdrop.

"Oh my Goddess." Uncle Leo exclaims when he sees Pete and I standing out in the hallway just staring at the hoard of people in fathers office. "What are you two doing over here? This is not where we get breakfast."

He leads us away from the commotion and into the kitchen. He gets out three bowls, three spoons, the honey-nut cheerios, and the milk. He pours all of the ingredients and starts eating his cereal while Pete and I stare at him, waiting for an explanation.

"Are you going to tell us or not?" I blurt out finally.

"Yeah. What happened?" Pete asks through a mouthful of cheerios.

"It's your father." Uncle Leo whispers.

"What about him?" I press.

"He's gone."

"What do you mean 'he's gone'?"

Pete has dropped his spoon and is looking down into his lap waiting to hear Uncle Leo's answer.

"Uncle Leo."

"He left." He makes it a point to look is both in the eyes.

"But today's moms funeral." Pete says quietly. "When will he be back?"

I have a bad feeling about this, and somehow I also feel that this bad news is my fault. I watch Uncle Leo close his eyes and take a deep breath, obviously a family trait, as he prepares himself to tell us something big. I reach out for Pete's hand and hold it tight once he clasps his hand in mine. We both countdown quietly and to ourselves.

"He left the pack."