Chapter Five:

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CHAPTER FIVE:

We'd gone only a few steps into the trees when he stopped. We were barely on the trail- I could still see the house. Some walk.

Edward leaned against a tree and stared at me, his expression unreadable. "Okay," I said, my voice sounding a lot braver then it felt, "let's talk." He took a deep breath.

"Bella, we're leaving."

It felt like the air had been knocked out of me. Because I knew, instantly, that the 'we' he was talking about didn't include me.

I stared at him, wordlessly, in complete and utter shock and horror. Edward waited, motionlessly, soundlessly, and without any sign of impatience.

"No-" I whispered, finally. "No!" I repeated, my voice growing in volume. "You promised! In Phoenix, you promised you would stay-"

"As long as that was best for you," he interrupted to correct me. "And obviously, this is not." I shook my head wildly from side to side. The branches on the trees around us began to shake- my emotions were going haywire inside me, and my magic was responding to that, churning and lashing out.

"What happened with Jasper- that was nothing, Edward! Nothing!"

"You're right," he agreed. "It was exactly what was to be expected."

"No!" Tears began to spill down my cheeks. "Edward, please-" I wanted to sound angry, but it just sounded like I was begging. He took a deep breath and stared, unseeingly, at the ground for a long moment. His mouth twisted the tiniest bit. When he finally looked up, his eyes were different, harder- like the liquid gold had frozen solid.

"Bella, I don't want you to come with me." He spoke the words slowly and precisely, his cold eyes on my face, watching as I absorbed what he was really saying. "Of course, I'll always love you... in a way. But what happened the other night made me realize that it's time for a change. Because I'm... tired of pretending to be something I'm not, Bella. I've let this go on much too long, and I'm sorry for that, but-"

"Just stop with the bullshit, okay?" I shouted, interrupting him. He opened his mouth to continue speaking, but I slashed my hand angrily through the air, cutting him off. I took a deep breath, forcing myself to calm down. "I deserve better then this, Edward! I want the truth. Just... just tell me the fucking truth."

His face crumbles abruptly, the coldness melting away, leaving only despair. "I'm not good for you Bella," he whispers, voice choked, "you'll be so much better off without me and my family. You were tortured by a vampire just over two weeks ago! Last night you were almost killed-"

"No, I wasn't," I interrupted, "I had my magic, it was all under control!" Edward gestures at me, his movements somewhat wild.

"And that's another point- you could have been caught last night by Snatchers! If Jasper had attacked you any earlier, using magic would have activated the Trace, and you'd be captured! I've already almost got you caught by Snatchers once- I don't want you to become another name on Potterwatch, Bella... and I couldn't live with myself if I was the one responsible for putting it there."

Tears begin to slide down my cheeks, and my knees must have started to shake because the trees were suddenly wobbling, but it wasn't my magic, this time. No, my magic was no longer out of control, rather it was weighing down on me, a heavy shroud of despair.

"Promise me," his golden eyes are blazing with a desperate intensity, "promise me you won't be reckless, Bella- that you'll be safe!" I ignore his words, his pleas.

"I love you," I tell him, my voice choked, "I love you. Do you love me?" I turn my pleading gaze up to meet his. "Do you love me Edward? Please... please tell me the truth- you owe me that much!"

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