Choice

Chapter 14

I knock on the door and hear it creek open eyeing the captain’s wife as she throws open the door “Amanda!” I watch her lean forward giving me a big hug and she motions for me to enter the large cabin. I walk in hearing the sound of the Christmas music and feel the captains wife’s hands come to my coat “ill hang it?” I slide it off watching her hang it on a nearby coat rack. She motions to the large living room “sit, relax, Richie is on his way.”

I glance around the large open cabin eyeing the big Christmas tree and hear her laugh “Richie helped cut it down and Owen helped bring it in.” I bite my lip “Owen?” She smiles “yea, they use to be such trouble but both of them grew up, and even though they were trouble they always offered to help out.” She grins “I bet you’re proud of Owen?” I nod “yea, college.” She smiles putting an ornament on the tree “what was his major again?” She looks back to me and my mind goes blank “umm, it was-” 

Before I can lie a knock on the door interrupts saving me from my own embarrassment. I watch the captain’s wife go to the door opening it and watch Richie walk through the now open door. He hugs the captain’s wife and whispers something and she nods happily “of course it’s fine..” I watched Richie poke his head out and I feel my hand shake as I eye my brother walk into the large cabin. I hear the captain’s wife happily announce “my, isn't this a surprise, Owen?” Owen nods to her but remains quiet and I hear the captains wife continue as she turns to me “you knew, didn't you?” I shrug telling a lie “of course.” She nudges Owen “I was just getting the dirt on you from your sister, but I guess I can go right to the source now huh?” He nods but still remains quiet and I feel a chill run up my spine as he glares toward me.

I sigh sitting at the table and watch as she takes Owen jacket then Richie’s. I hear her laugh out “dinner will be ready soon.  Owen would you mind setting the table?” He nods again without even answering and goes right for the draws as if he’s been here hundreds of times before. I watch him set the table and as he finishes he slowly sits into a seat and Richie sits next to him. I watch the captain come into the large cabin and hear his happy voice “Owen?” He smiles as he comes over sitting down and I eye the scene as if I am not even there.

I watch Owen sit back in his chair and look around as if studying the people who surround him. I hear the captains wife chime in as she begins serving food “Owen, what was it you were majoring in again?” I hear Richie answer for Owen “computer science isn't it?” I watch Owen nod his head but he still doesn't speak and I lean back trying to understand him as Richie laughs “and what was the minor again?” I finally hear my brother’s voice as he speaks firm and to the point “criminology.” I hear the captain laugh “oh I didn't know they offered that as a minor?” I watch Owen shake his head “it’s a double major computer science with concentration in security and criminology thinking about possible law school.” I hear the captain “a lawyer? God no, I hate lawyers." Owen smiles “so do I.” The captain laughs out “who would have thought Owen and Richie on the right side of the law an officer and a future lawyer.” I state the obvious “not me.” I hear the captain laugh “well I knew these boys would clean up their act, given time.”

I watch Owen slowly push around his food remaining quiet but the captain brings the topic back to him “what have you been up to Owen, once you graduated you ran huh?” I watch Owen nod and hear Richie laugh “well last summer he traveled.” Owen nods again remaining quiet letting Richie do all his talking and I bite my lip wanting to blurt out my main question but remain quiet. The captain chimes in again “where did you go Owen?” Owen ignores the question pushing around his food and Richie again answers “he went all over Paris, Italy and a few other places the names I can’t pronounce.” 

Richie nudges Owen who nods as he continues pushing his food around not even attempting to eat. The captain laugh “Paris huh, did you go alone or was there a girl?” Richie interrupts “who goes to Paris alone?” I hear my captain laugh out “so there is, or was?”  Owen grins as he sips his drink and glances up to the captain as if sharing a secret “was, is or always.” I watch Richie shake his head patting Owen on the shoulder “stop with your riddles.” Owen laughs sitting back “oh come on Richie it’s just a game.” He turns his head sideways and smiles to me but looks back down eyeing his meal as he mumbles “just a game.”

I hear the captain laugh out as if knowing all the answers to questions I haven’t even begun to ask. The captain pushes his empty plate forward rubbing the back of his head. He gets up making his way towards the jacket rack. He pushes on his coat and motions to the rack “Owen, take a walk?” I watch Owen stop his fork as he shoves it into the meat and quickly pushes it to his mouth. He drops his fork closing his eyes as if savoring the flavor. Owen walks over to the rack shuffling through the jackets getting his long black coat. He runs his fingers over it. I watch him slip it on and watch as the captain opens the door questioning Owen “alright?” Owen nods as he slowly buttons his jacket and turns back to Talmon he nods to him and firmly states his name “Talmon?”

Richie glances up from his meal nodding to Owen as if understanding a silent agreement as he watches Owen make his way out the door. The captain follows Owen out and  Richie laughs out as if breaking the long dark silence in the room “my god, this chicken is just amazing, reminds me of my mother’s.” The captain’s wife looks down pushing the food around her plate as if ignoring something obvious to everyone but me. I bite my lip eyeing the captain’s wife, then Richie and notice the slight twitch in his hand that I hadn't seen since high school.

I turn away stating the obvious “Talmon?” I hear him laugh out ignoring my voice as he continues “so what is the secret, there must be something to get it to taste this way huh?” The captains wife laughs out “now Richie, a good cook never reveals her secret.” I glance up watching her point her fork and hear Richie laugh out in an attempted happy sense but failing. I glance up again this time pushing for his attention “Richie?” I hear Richie’s fake laugh die down as he clears his throat and finally answers me “yea?” I eye his hand as his fork jilts missing the piece of chicken he attempted to pick up.

He laughs out placing his fork down and I state the obvious “what are you so afraid of?” I glance up eyeing his pale face noting the slight twitch as he states "afraid?” I nod remembering from when we were kids “that look, the shaking, you use to get it all the time back when your dad would show up.” I watch him grip his hand as he sits up as if trying to hide the visible shake.   I again state “what are you so afraid of now?” Talmon shakes his head as if warding off something horrible but the captain’s wife interrupts “it’s the food, his mother, she gave me the recipe a long time ago, I’m sorry.” Richie shakes his head “fine, its fine.” I watch Richie walk to the coat rack “I should find Owen its getting dark.” He slips on his jacket and I watch as he goes to opens the door but the captain walks in. 

The captain shuts the door firmly behind him and glares to Richie the glare was so quick I barely made it out. He shift his eyes back to me stating facts “Owen, he, he decided to go home.” I watch the captain slowly remove his jacket and watch him place it on the rack. Richie glances back to me then to the captain as I hear him state “why?” The captain glares up to Richie again as if wanting to lunge towards him but instead places his hand on Richie shoulder “not here, later, it can wait.” Talmon grips his jacket closed and angrily pushes pass the captain and out the door most likely going after Owen.

The captain pushes on his jacket again exiting the cabin and I watch his wife stand eyeing the door as it slams shut. She shakes her head collecting plates as she makes her way to the sink. I watch her drop the plates down into the sink letting them crash into it. She shakes her head stating facts “Owen, was everything to my granddaughter. He had her whole life in his hands, she would do anything for that boy.” She turns back to me “we never liked Owen. He was a rough guy because he wanted better for his granddaughter, but now if we knew this was going to happen. We just want Owen to know we were wrong, he turned out better than anyone in this god awful town.”

I stand eyeing her as she wipes her face with her sleeve and I question “you knew Lily was dating Owen?” She glances up to me “Owen doesn't have anything to do with what happened to Lily.” I step closer to her “what happened? What do you mean? Did something happen to her?” She shakes her head turning back to the dishes “I mean her disappearing like that, she, she had Owen, we just thought it was possible maybe she just ran away, but then we really knew something had happened when we got this.”

She reaches into her apron pocket and holds it out to me and I take it. I unfold the white piece of paper and eye the small card typed across it the word choice. I turn it around reading the choice and she shakes her head “he had to choose between himself and her, it, it wasn't a fair choice.” She looks down “we figured because he ignored it Lily was dead, but a part of me hopes that maybe, maybe she is out there somewhere.” I push the note into my pocket and I feel her hand brush mine as she holds it “he’s your brother, but he was so much more to Lily. if there is even a chance she is out there, he would be the one to know.”