Fantastic Bastards In Monroeville (Frerard)

Five

I actually managed to get a decent amount of sleep last night. I dreamt of me and Frank smiling and laughing like we didn't have a care in the world. We both woke up and took turns showering, then headed to the cafeteria for breakfast. Today it's french toast and bacon. I really wish I could make Frank proud of me for eating, but I just can't do it. From what I've heard, french toast and bacon is high in fat. I know Lindsey wouldn't want me to eat any of this. Hopefully at lunch they'll serve something healthier. If so, maybe I'll eat a little bit. I am fucking starving, and the only way I can shut up my growling stomach is if I put some food in it.

"The french toast isn't that bad. You should try some," Frank said. As I stared at my food, an attendee came up to me and Frank. I read what was on his nametag. His name was Joshua.

"Gerard, can I talk to you in private?" he asked. Ugh. I'd rather not, but I'm not feeling up to causing any problems at the moment. I'm that lazy right now. I turned to Frank, silently telling him I'll be right back. I walked out of the cafeteria and down the hall with Joshua, wondering what the hell this guy could possibly want this early in the morning. I just wanna go back to the cafeteria and be with Frank, damn it. Whatever this guy wants, it better be quick.

"So, we had a discussion with the dietician. You haven't eaten much since you've been here. If this continues...we'll have no choice but to force-feed you Ensure," the attendee warned. That was when my eyes went wide. When did I ever consent to someone force-feeding me? I want to review over my rights. There's no way they can do this to me! I refuse! "So if I were you, I would start eating. This is your last warning,"

Fuck you. I'm not gonna let you force-feed me. If I don't wanna eat, then I don't wanna eat. I shouldn't eat anyway. Have you seen how much I weigh?

After Joshua was finished giving me the force-feeding warning, I returned to the cafeteria, where Frank was waiting for me. I sighed deeply, going back to staring at the food I so badly don't wanna eat.

"What did he have to say?" Frank asked. I told him about what Joshua had to say to me, and that made Frank's jaw hit the floor.

"What? That's crazy! You really should eat. I don't wanna see that happen to you,"

I'm really sorry, Frank. I really wish I could eat. I can't, though. If I eat, I'll slip up and end up eating too much...

I sighed deeply, putting my face into my hands, wishing I could disappear. It's not fair. All I wanna do is be skinny. I'll be fucked if I eat a morsel of food. My stomach is screaming at me, begging me to feed it something. Beside me, Frank put a supporting hand on my back, rubbing it. If only starving yourself weren't this hard...

_ _ _

After a few group meetings, visiting hours came by. I sat in the day room, watching some cartoon as I waited for my brother to arrive. I wonder if he was gonna come see me today. I have a good feeling that he will. I don't know where Frank went; he said he had to get ready for his dad to stop by. I really hope he does. It's really heartbreaking to see no visitors come to see Frank. He deserves someone besides me in his life that gives a shit about him.

I turned around and found Mikey walking towards me. He smiled and waved at me, holding a grocery bag full of stuff.

"Hey, Gee. I brought you some more clothes and a notebook," he said, pulling out the notebook and handing it to me. I looked at it, then back to Mikey. Since Mikey doesn't know sign language, he had to buy a notebook for me so that I could communicate with him. What was I gonna say to him? I'm still mad at him for saving me and making me go to this hell hole, but I know I can't hold a grudge against him forever. He's my brother, and I love him. Me and Mikey went into the cafeteria and sat down at one of the tables. Mikey grabbed a pen out of his coat pocket and handed it to me.